


Shout and Shake (Bring the House Down)

by EmeraldOre (Raayner)



Series: Ah, Romance [1]
Category: Hermitcraft RPF
Genre: Ableism, Anal Sex, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Biting, Bittersweet, Clothed Sex, Complicated Relationships, Emotional Manipulation, Eventual Happy Ending, Friends With Benefits, Frottage, Hate Sex, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, MILD - Freeform, Making Out, Mild Blood, Mildly Dubious Consent, No Aftercare, Old Married Couple, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Past Infidelity, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Rough Sex, Self-Isolation, Unhealthy Relationships, also bubbles gets around fair warning, anxiety spirals, because doc has a prosthetic arm and bdubs is an asshole, emotions got involved i'm sorry, old divorced couple
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-09
Updated: 2020-11-14
Packaged: 2021-03-01 04:20:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 25,436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23079259
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Raayner/pseuds/EmeraldOre
Summary: They never actually got a divorce.When they had an argument to bring down the walls and Bdubs had left, Doc said good riddance and went on with his life - he barely even noticed when two years had passed and he hadn’t seen hide nor hair of his husband.- - -Bdubs and Doc separated years ago, but now they live right next to each other, sharing a house literally split down the middle. Tensions are high and everyone is worried, but they are determined everything will work out in the end, right? It has to, or they both might break in the process...
Relationships: Docm77/BdoubleO100, Minor or Background Relationship(s), bdoubleo100/others
Series: Ah, Romance [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1689655
Comments: 261
Kudos: 398





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!  
> This is my first foray into hermitcraft fic wooooo~
> 
> My fiance and I fell in love with their dynamic this season and I need some content - time to make it myself!
> 
> Their relationship in this is not and probably won't ever be good, but the can't help but come back and bang all the freaking time. This fic will be that. It's not super steamy this chapter but it will earn that E rating soon.  
> Also bubbles gets back at doc by sleeping with a lot of people in this ok just a warning.
> 
> Tags will be updated as we go and I figure out what this fic will actually be alrighty enjoy~!

So, here’s the thing.

They never actually got a divorce.

\- - - 

“This is mine, this is mine! I found him first,” he took a swing at the Drowned, trying to jump out of its reach. He hissed in pain as he was too slow, a cut appearing on his arm. 

He pulled himself out of the water and glared up at the cyborg. The Drowned took the moment of distraction to impale him with its trident, sending agonizing pain through his chest for the second it took for him to respawn, shooting up from the bed with a growl.

“Doc! If you get the trident I’m gonna -” Bdubs stormed back to the water, “did you get it? Did you!?”

“... No. I have your things.”

“Hey! I need those - those are mine!” He snatched his stuff from Doc’s hands, growling at the sneer on the other man’s face. 

“Be careful, _‘dubs_ \- don’t want to lose your tools.”

-

“What are you doing,” Doc said.

“I’m - I’m digging _my_ mine! What are _you_ doing?”

“This is private property!”

Bdubs laughed, “this is half my land, buster! I can dig wherever I please.”

-

“Mow your lawn.”

“I have a fence! You don’t have to look at it unless you come on _my_ side! And it’s only so _your_ cat doesn’t come over here - you know I’m allergic!”

“I didn’t ask you to live here. You could have built _any_ house, _any_ where.”

“And let you steal away _my_ mansion? Uh, no-way! I legally own half of this,” Bdubs opened a panel in the fence, glaring across at the empty building.

Doc quickly slammed it shut in his face, growling out “you should have stayed gone, then.”

\- - -

When they had an argument to bring down the walls and Bdubs had left, Doc said good riddance and went on with his life - he barely even noticed when two years had passed and he hadn’t seen hide nor hair of his husband. 

Even when he did come back they kept their distance from each other, rarely in the others circles and never meeting by choice. They were done. History. Old news.

The fact they hadn’t signed any papers and legally ended things didn’t matter.

Until Grian’s damn mansion.

Suddenly, everything was _theirs_ again. Neither could dispute the others’ claim and neither could they back down from this challenge. The other hermits were concerned, but they knew how it went if you got between Bdubs and Doc when they were fighting. 

So no, they had never really gotten divorced.

\- - -

The goat thing was new, Bdubs decided. If it had been a thing when they were together, he would have killed Doc by now. As it was, that mountain was starting to get on his nerves. 

_Why does he always have to be so annoying_ , Bdubs thought, _G.O.A.T. this, goat that. As if he’s so much better than me now!_

His heels bumped the side of the floor as he swung his legs into the open air outside his half of the mansion. It was really starting to come together, even if it was just the first floor for now. Bdubs enjoyed the work, enjoyed making this a new home, and would enjoy it even more once it was done and so much better than Doc’s.

Doc would _hate_ that.

He liked to think he wasn’t just as petty, if not more, than him, but Bdubs knew Doc well. This whole “thrive” thing was an act, a mask, as if he wouldn’t be making a new trap or planting more bees under Bdubs’ nose once he got annoyed enough. 

Bdubs smirked. Oh yeah, he knew his husband.

_Speak of the devil. . ._

Doc appeared from whatever he had been doing with the villagers, glancing at the fence with a wrinkled nose, and then tracing his gaze up, up, until his eyes landed on Bdubs and the flesh side of his face twisted into a teeth-bared grimace. Bdubs waved playfully from his seat upon the rafters until Doc turned and disappeared around the other side of the house.

“Asshole,” Bdubs spat, swinging off his perch to the floor and making his way down to the ground level. 

He smiled when he saw BeeDoubleO buzz out of the hive, name tag swaying peacefully in the breeze. Honestly, the bee was probably the best gift Doc had ever given him, as unintentional as it was. BeeDoubleO drifted by and Bdubs brushed the tiny puffs of pollen from his arm after the bee gently brushed against it.

“ _You took the bee_.”

Bdubs jumped, whirling around to find Doc standing behind him with a frown on his face.

“Don’t sneak up on me! Make some damn noise or something you freak.”

Doc didn’t react to that, still looking at the nest where the bee had gone in. 

“You took. The bee. And, you _broke_ into my things and took a hive.”

“Excuse you,” Bdubs scoffed, “the bee was clearly mine! You put a sign that said ‘free honey, honey’ and left the bee there for me,” he stood up straighter, “if you didn’t want me to take it, you should have made that more obvious, _honey_.”

Doc’s eyes flicked up to his face at that, the word dripping with scorn. His hand twisted into a fist and he took a step forward.

“You owe me.”

“For the bee?” Bdubs laughed, “no way -”

He was shoved none too gently against his fence, a metallic hand gripping his shirt.

“You owe me,” Doc snarled in his face, body pressing up against his, “for messing up my hives, and the hours of work it cost me.”

“I - nngh,” Bdubs whined as a knee pressed between his own, heat beginning to pool in his groin, “not a chance.” 

He barely got the words out before a mouth crashed against his own, knocking his head into the thin wood of the fence. Doc’s sharper than human teeth nicked his lips as he bit at them, growling. Bdubs pushed back, hands raising to tangle in Doc’s hair, yanking it enough to change the angle, moaning as their tongues met. 

Doc pressed him more firmly into the fence, nudging his legs apart until he could brush Bdubs’ rapidly growing erection against his thigh. Doc’s hands met Bdubs’ and pulled them from his hair, pinning his wrists as his tongue plundered his mouth. It was a slightly pointed tongue, longer than a humans, and one Bdubs had enjoyed many times. Even now, feeling it dominate his and flick against his molars made his knees weak. Or maybe that was the friction, but who could say.

Bdubs struggled against the hold on his wrists, but Doc’s grip was iron. His erection throbbed in his pants as Doc thrust, the angle terrible enough to do _almost_ nothing but crave a firmer touch. One of his wrists were suddenly freed as Doc’s fingers twisted in his hair and he pulled, mouths separating with a gasp. 

He barely had time to realize his hand was free before Doc was mouthing down his neck. Bdubs’ hand found Doc’s coat, gripping it so tightly it nearly ripped. His eyes flew open as teeth, knowingly, achingly familiar with the path, found their way to his collarbone and digged in. 

“Ahh,” Bdubs panted out, trying in vain to thrust his hips, desperate for any friction. 

Doc pulled back, apparently satisfied with the small pinpricks of red he had left. He stepped back, a hand high and flat on Bdubs’ chest keeping him from collapsing. They were both panting, erections straining against their pants as they glared at each other.

“You. Owe. Me.” Doc gritted out one last time, stepping back and releasing Bdubs from his grasp. With a stiff nod, he turned and disappeared back to his side of the mansion.

Bdubs stood a moment more, leaning against the fence and wiping his mouth. His hand came back bloody and there were stinging in his lips, and an ache beginning on his collarbone. 

_Asshole_ , he thought. 

Fine, he owed Doc. He’d pay him back later. For now, he had some more. . . urgent business down south to take care of.

Well, Tango had wanted to come by for something, might as well be now.

Bdubs smirked, licking his sore lip. 

_Not so goat now, are we Doc?_


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter includes bdubs/tango just a heads up!

He wasn’t entirely sure what Tango was up to.

When he had extended the invite to come over, the other hermit had arrived quickly, a bounce in his step, but he hadn’t told him  _ why _ . Bdubs hadn’t seen Doc since earlier, but he made sure to call out a loud greeting to Tango, just in case he had been in earshot. 

Now, Bdubs was slowly working on his rooftop garden, looking down towards the basement where Tango had disappeared to hours ago. He had heard some faint construction sounds and Tango muttering to himself when he had passed by the stairs, but he was no closer to figuring out what, exactly, the blonde was doing. 

Bdubs stood up from his crouch over the pumpkin seedlings with a sigh and stretched, hands on his hips, not caring about the dirt on his hands. The sun was getting low and he’d have to set up one of the makeshift beds in one of the rooms now if he wanted to get a good night's rest. He had hoped that he and Tango would have time for a little fooling around - probably not likely now. 

He was just about to climb down the short ladder when he heard Tango call up to him. Bdubs ran down the rest of the stairs in a way he hoped didn’t make him look too eager. The red-eyed man was standing in front of a rough cobblestone wall, effectively blocking his view of whatever he had been building.

“Am I finally allowed to know what’s been going on in my basement?” 

“Bdubs! Man of the hour! Here you are,” Tango grinned, “I have a gift for the owner of this beautiful house.” 

“Well, I’ve been screwed out of half of it, as you can see.”

“I’m talking about the interior! You’ve been busy today, man.”

Bdubs warmed at the praise. “Thank you! I’m glad someone’s noticed!”

Tango’s eyes sparkled with humour, pulling a pick out and handing it to him.

“As a welcome back - I’ve built you something for privacy  _ and _ comfort.”

The cobblestone broke easily under his strikes, unveiling a finished stairway leading down. Bdubs glanced at Tango and then walked forward when he got a nod of permission from the other man. The smile on his face steadily grew as the stairs entered into a warmly lit room; stripped log walls, a beautiful backsplash of teal behind a dark lattice, and a large bed framed by flowing white fabric. There were even blue and white flowers - his favourite. 

“Oh,” he was almost speechless, “oh my goodness.”

“So, I made you a little bedroom.”

“Oh wow, oh my goodness, I love it! Tango,” Bdubs waved his arms, gesturing to all of it, “I can’t believe it! This is nice - real nice! Wow!”

“I’m glad you like it,” Tango laughed, “I thought you’d enjoy a little privacy, what with the half house and all.”

“I do! I really do! What do I owe you?”

“No, no, it’s a gift. I won’t take any diamonds for it.”

“Well,” Bdubs ran a hand along the blankets, “it would be a shame not to try it out. It is late, afterall.” He looked up with a flirtatious wink, “spend the night?”

For a moment, Tango just stood there, biting his lip. He glanced up the stairs before looking back at Bdubs.

“Is this a Doc thing?”

“What?” he grimaced, “no! Maybe I just want to have a fun, sexy night with one of my friends, huh? Not  _ everything’s _ about that asshole!”

“Bdubs, I’ve known you both for a long time. I  _ know _ how you two are. And -” Tango pointed at his neck, “don’t think I don’t see that bruise.”

Bdubs groaned and flopped down on the bed ( _ wow, that is soft _ , he thought), covering the bitten area with his hand. 

“Ugh! Fine! Maybe it is about him - but it’s his fault for leaving me with a boner!”

Tango laughed at that, coming to sit on the bed beside him. “No one’s making you share the bay with him. You could’ve just built your half of the mansion on the other side of the map from him, man.”

“Then he’d  _ win _ , the bastard!”

“Whatever game you guys are playing, I’m sure you’ll both lose.”

Bdubs grunted but didn’t otherwise respond to that. They sat in silence for a few minutes before Tango reached out and took Bdubs’ in his with a sigh.

“I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to,” he said, “but only this once. I know how you guys get and I’m not gonna be in the middle of it - you’ll have to find someone dumber than me.” His smile was soft when he looked down at Bdubs. “But how could I turn down a night with ‘The Master of Sleep’ himself?”

Bdubs barked out a laugh at the silly title, then used their joined hands to pull Tango down for a kiss that started slow, but soon became desperate and heated. 

The new sheets were sinfully soft against his skin and the sensation, coupled with his earlier encounter with Doc, had Bdubs hard in no time. He ran his hand up Tango’s leg and found his pants similarly straining. He squeezed a few times before his hand continued its journey up Tango’s belly, then chest, and finally wound its way up his neck to rest against the back of his head. 

Bdubs felt the other man shiver under his touch and smiled internally. He tightened his grip and then rolled Tango onto his back and straddled him, pulling out of the kiss with a gasp to look down on his work. Tango’s blond hair was wild against the bed and his skin was flushed, the colour rising in his cheeks almost matching his ruby eyes. Bdubs leaned forward, hand tangled in the sheets, rolling his hips and rubbing their clothed cocks together, relishing Tango’s broken moan beneath him.

He began to untie the others’ pants and yanked up his shirt as well, beginning to kiss his way down his chest. Bdubs nosed at the dusting of blonde hair on his stomach for a second, then slid lower, pulling Tango’s pants from his hips.

“Now, mister Tango,” he said, “I believe I owe you for this beautiful bed.”

\- - -

He made sure to walk Tango to his boat in the morning. 

“Thank you for the bedroom - best sleep I’ve had in a while!” 

Tango yawned, trying to get his hair to not look like someone had used it like handlebars. “At least one of us did.”

He got in his boat and started to paddle away before stopping to call back to Bdubs. 

“Hey, good luck, man. And be careful,” he stressed, then waved and sped off to wherever his base was now. 

Bdubs rolled his eyes and turned to go back to his house, when his eyes landed on the stone-still figure of Doc on his front porch. He bit down on a victorious smile as he waved. 

“Howdy neighbour!”

There was something red in Doc’s hand, the object unclear to Bdubs until he got close enough to see it was the remains of an apple, crushed to paste and dripping from the fingers of his metal arm. Had he brought that for him?

“What can I do for you,  _ honey _ ?” he asked, stepping onto the porch.

Doc seemed to shake himself as he drew near, glancing down at the mess in his hand before unclenching it and shaking the pulp off. He drew in a breath when he turned towards him.

“I was coming to tell you I know what you can do to get rid of your debt. You clearly owe me, and I want a master bedroom.”

“Yeah,” Bdubs snorted, “like I’d do tha-”

Before he could react, Doc’s hand was on his wrist like a vice, dragging him uncomfortably close. 

“ _You. Owe. Me._ Remember?” the grip on his wrist increased, “build it for me.”

He tried to pull his wrist back but Doc stood firm, unblinking as they held each other's gaze. 

“Fucking - ouch! Fine! Fine! I’ll build your stupid bedroom,” his wrist was released, “you sadist!”

Doc just growled and nodded, satisfied with his answer. Bdubs rubbed his wrist, sneering at the other man who was still in his space.

“So this’ll make us square? I won’t owe you  _ anything _ for the honey sorting thing anymore?”

“Yes.”

“Good.”

They continued to stare at each other until Doc nodded once more then reached into his bag, pulling out two books that shone with the telltale shimmer of enchantment. He pushed them into Bdubs’ hands.

“To help you work.”

“I don’t need your pity books, Doc! I can get my own damn books!”

Ignoring him, Doc just turned on his heel and stalked off in the weird, menacing way he did. He didn’t look back once, and Bdubs watched in silence until he had disappeared into the bowels of his half of the mansion. 

_ Probably gonna go jerk it to his goat lord or whatever _ , he thought.

He began to look through his chests for materials as a plan started to form in his mind.

_ I’ll build him a bedroom, alright. Greatest bedroom I’ve ever made. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> man this chapter really kicked my ass. I could not figure out how to write Tango aaa
> 
> sorry for the fade to black I promise the real sex is coming (tbh probably next chapter) I just couldn't get Tango written well enough for my liking


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My fiance got the new animal crossing on friday and we were self-isolating waiting a covid test (we're negative btw yay) so I was very distracted writing this chapter. I swear it took me like 3 days to finish the sex scene!
> 
> Enjoy~

Their decision to get married had been somewhat… spontaneous.

They had been fucking for almost a year - in an actual relationship for three months - and things had been alright. Sure, they fought like a cat and dog most of the time, petty and mean in their words, but the sex was fantastic and they were _equals_. 

Doc wasn’t sure if he had ever met anyone who could challenge him like Bdubs could; neither could back down from an argument or concede their point, and he never let him get away with shit. He _hated_ it.

He loved him.

And sometimes, sometimes they had good days - fantastic days even! Days they spent in bed, waking late to sun-warmed sheets and lazy kisses, leaving the comfort of the other’s arms only for food or the bathroom. Those soft days were few and far between, but that and everything else made it worth it.

It was one of these days that they had gotten married.

Doc had woken to Bdubs’ toned arms around his chest and kisses being pressed along the flesh side of his face. 

“Morning,” he hummed, twisting to bring their mouths together.

“Mornin’,” Bdubs smiled against his lips, “I’m hungry.”

They had gotten up and made breakfast, and while they were eating he looked at Bdubs with a warm gaze. 

“Marry me,” Doc asked.

Bdubs had nearly choked on his eggs, but took a long look at the other man and agreed. They decided they wanted as little fanfare as possible, and so they found the nearest hermit-free village, enlisted the resident cleric, and were married before the day was out. As they split and ate an apple as per this village’s traditions, Doc was happy. 

They went home, and for the first time, what they did could be called ‘making love’. They didn’t leave the house for three days.

Everyone else was confused, to say the least, when they announced their bonding, but Bdubs just laughed it off and Doc smiled because, even when they were at each other’s throats, he knew they still loved each other. 

He doesn’t even remember what the fight that had ended their relationship had been. It was something trivial, something neither of them really cared about, but it was the final straw in a whole hay bale of arguments. Bdubs had shouted his voice hoarse, and Doc remembers the week of errors his software had given him after thanks to how hard he clenched his fists and teeth. Bdubs didn’t come back that night, or the night after, or any of the nights for the next two years; Doc didn’t wait up. 

Afterall, if Bdubs didn’t care enough, why should he?

\- - -

Doc shook loose from the memories, blinking up at the leaves of the tree above his bed. The bed in his garden was serviceable, but he couldn’t wait for an actual bedroom with a roof. 

He groaned, pulling the blanket over his head as he remembered yesterday. 

_What a mess._

He had wanted to discuss things with Bdubs, offer an olive branch - or an apple, as it were. But then Tango had been there. 

He wasn’t exactly surprised; he knew Bdubs slept with other people - had done it during their relationship when they had bigger fights - and the jealousy was a familiar ache in his chest. What had hurt more, however, was that he _knew_ it had been done to spite him. 

The years apart had left him no longer accustomed to the frustration he felt at Bdubs’ actions, and he had been taken aback by how strong his reaction had been. 

_Damn it all._ Doc needed to apologise. 

He got up with a huff, blanket sliding off the bed to pile on the grass. He was about to go through some of his chests to get some items when he noticed the paper, folded and pinned to a sign facing the ocean. 

Tugging it gently from the nail, he opened it to find Bdubs’ hurried chicken scratch. 

_hello neighbour_

_i have completed the room you have requested_

_according to you this will clear my debt owed to you because of bees_

_hope you like it <3 _

_\- bdubs_

_Already,_ he thought, _really?_

Doc had expected he would have to wait at least a week until it was even started, let alone finished. But a day? He might as well go inspect it - even if Bdubs worked through the night he doubted he had put that much effort into it. 

He entered his half of the mansion, walking through the grand hall, past his chests and portal, and climbed the new spiral staircase to his new room. 

The first thing he saw was pink.

And white, and _pink, and white, and pink_ again!

“Wh-” he stuttered, “what. The fuck?”

The walls had been coloured in pink and white stripes and the bed was a canopied monstrosity. A closet had been added, ruffled curtains hiding pale wooden doors. His mountain, painstakingly carved by hand, was framed by the open window, and the flowers in the newly installed planter rustled in the ocean breeze. 

Doc opened his mouth, but no words could escape. He stood there, overwhelmed with the horrible colour and fists forming at his sides.

“Do you _love_ it?”

He turned at the voice to find Bdubs standing at the top of the stairs, a shit-eating grin spread across his face. He sauntered over, gesturing at the entirety of the room he had built.

“Beautiful, right?” 

“I - you!”

“You’re so moved that you’re speechless? Awe,” Bdubs reached out and tapped him on the nose, “that’s sweet, Doc!”

“You,” he growled, Bdubs _knew_ he hated pink, “why would you do this?”

“To brighten up the place! You look so gloomy over here, Mr. Goat!”

“You will pay for this,” Doc gritted out, reaching out and latching onto Bdubs’ shirt. The other man glanced down at his hand with an unconcerned expression, eyebrow raising.

“Make me,” he challenged.

They met in the middle, their lips crashing together with force, Bdubs’ hands jerking up to grip his head, Doc’s hands on his sides. They pulled close, bodies pressed together as they each fought for dominance of the kiss. Doc felt a sting as his lip was bit hard enough to draw blood, and he responded by pulling their hips together, grinding his cock against the answering hardness there. 

Doc was suddenly shoved backwards and he let go with a start, panting. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand while Bdubs stood across from him, glaring. 

“God,” Bdubs snarled, “I hate you. Take your _fucking_ pants off.”

He opened his mouth, but Bdubs was already working on his belt. Doc shrugged off his coat and left the pants on, smirking when that got him a murderous look. 

“If you want my pants off that badly,” he said, “you’re going to have to remove them yourself.”

Bdubs’ pants were off, boxers doing little to hide how hard he was. The familiar sight of his slightly flushed chest had arousal curling low and hot in Doc’s stomach. His own erection strained against his fly, but he ignored it in favour of nodding his head, inviting Bdubs to try.

An offended expression flickered across Bdubs’ face, but was replaced by a calculated look. He took a step forward and then dropped to his knees. His hands crept up Doc’s thighs slowly, as he leaned forward to run his nose up the hard line of his penis. He looked up and winked as his teeth found the metal zipper and gently drew it down. Bdubs’ fingers popped the button open and drew out the cyborg’s cock. 

It was… nearly human. Bdubs had never been sure what, exactly, Doc was - human with creeper skin, human-creeper hybrid, or something else entirely - but his penis was pretty different from anything he had seen. It was a prosthetic, made to act as close to natural as possible with Doc’s half-robotic body, but the skin always felt slightly different and too hard with the metal beneath. The upside? The ridges.

Bdubs slowly pulled Doc’s pants down, hot breath ghosting over the sensitive flesh. Doc shivered, leaning forward, but Bdubs just chuckled, moving into a crouch and away. He stepped backwards into the bedroom proper, voice teasing.

“C’mon, don’t you want to appreciate all my hard work?”

Doc kicked his pants the rest of the way off and followed him, grimacing.

“Playing ‘decorator’ is nowhere near hard work,” he tried to grab him, but Bdubs just danced away, “you did this to piss. Me. Off.”

“Of course I did,” Bdubs said, “it’s the only human emotion you have!”

He was in front of the bed, so Doc shoved him roughly onto it, grabbing his wrists and pinning them above his head. He hovered above Bdubs, jaw working angrily. The other man only looked up at him, sneering slightly. 

Unable to form words, Doc just took his mouth in a bruising kiss, pressing him into the mattress. Bdubs gasped, and he used the opportunity to lick his way in; their tongues curling together almost playfully. 

Doc shifted, drawing a knee up between Bdubs’ thighs, nudging them apart to grind on his hip. He struggled beneath him, arms straining, but he held on tight, savouring the other’s frustrated whine. 

Their lips separated and he began to bite along Bdubs’ jaw and throat, light enough to not break the skin, but still leaving his mark. The length of skin beneath Bdubs’ ear had always been particularly sensitive, Doc remembered, and the sound he made when his teeth began to sink in there confirmed it. He released a wrist to drop his hand and grab the front of Bdubs’ boxers, squeezing.

“ _Fuck_ ,” Bdubs gasped, thrusting into his hand.

Doc stopped for a moment to tug the hem down and pull out his cock, stroking it lightly before letting go, as Bdubs’ now freed hand pulled at his hair. He leaned back, dislodging the hold on his hair with a shake of his head. He put both hands on Bdubs’ chest and just _looked_ at the other man. 

His face and chest were flushed, new bite mark complimenting the older one, and with his dick proudly on display he looked gorgeous. And Doc was _so_ mad at him. 

“What?” Bdubs snapped.

Doc _snarled_ , dragging his nails down Bdubs’ chest.

“On your front. Face the window.”

“Wh - Hey! Gentle,” Bdubs shouted as Doc grabbed a thigh and rolled him. He ignored his complaints as he flipped him over, spreading Bdubs’ legs as he did so.

Doc gripped the boxers and, with one swift movement, ripped them down one side. Bdubs jerked at the noise, and Doc saw him biting his lip to keep from groaning at the show of strength. He grabbed an asscheek, thumbing at his hole, surprised when he found it already wet. He pressed experimentally and found the muscle lax and lubed, thumb slipping in easily. Doc chuckled.

“Did you enjoy your joke so much,” he asked, “that you went home and fucked yourself at it’s completion?”

“It did take me all night! Maybe I needed something to relax me after all that wor-”

Bdubs cut off with a moan, as Doc shoved two fingers inside him without resistance. His other hand tangled in Bdubs’ hair and shoved his face into the sheets while his fingers pistoned in and out. After a few seconds, he added a third, meeting only some resistance to the stretch. Bdubs panted into the mattress.

“You couldn’t work hard if your ass,” he punctuated his statement with a curl of his fingers, pressing against his prostate, Bdubs crying out, “depended on it. Look at my mountain, at how magnificent it is. Now that was _work_.”

“ _You’re a narcissist_ ,” Bdubs gasped out, breaking off at another brush to his prostate.

Doc pulled his fingers out and quickly rummaged through his items for lube, taking it out and slicking up his cock. He lined up and pushed in with one, quick thrust. 

Bdubs shouted a curse, grasping at the sheets as Doc took no time at all to set a brutal rhythm - sharp thrust in, long drag out. He knew this drove Bdubs crazy, his cock achingly close to that sweet spot, but far enough to be infuriating. He felt him try to shift, to bring a hand down to his crotch to bring some relief, but Doc’s free hand shot out and yanked it up beside his pinned head. 

“Not until I say so,” Doc growled.

He angled his thrust, earning a cry as he hit his prostate fully now. Bdubs began to match his pace, angling his hips and pushing back onto his cock, fucking himself to try to get that pleasure more and more. Doc gave it to him, pounding in and out of his hole with his own pleasured pants. Bdubs moaned low and long, punctuated with gasps at each nudge of his prostate. 

Doc felt himself growing close, each thrust earning a squeeze on his cock. He released Bdubs’ hand, but his own beat it there as he wrapped his fingers around and began to stroke it in time with his fucking. 

Bdubs came with a hoarse shout, legs shaking as cum spurt on the bright pink sheets. Doc pounded harder, seeking his own completion, the other man keening beneath him at each thrust of his sensitive hole. Finally, Doc pushed as deep as he could go and swore as he finished, Bdubs sighing in relief as he pulled out, and watched the cum start to drip down his thighs. 

“ _Fuck_ , man,” Bdubs panted, face down and boneless.

Doc eyes the hideous sheets, now stained with cum, and hummed in agreement, tugging them from under Bdubs and using the fabric to wipe both of them clean. 

Bdubs wiggled around, finding a pillow for his head, and patted the space next to him.

“It’s barely noon,” Doc argued.

“Shut up, it’s time for a nap,” Bdubs grumbled, “get over here.”

Doc waited a moment before he laid down next to him on his back. Bdubs cracked his eyes open just to roll them at him, smacking his stomach.

“Like a human, you freak.”

Doc huffed, annoyed, but turned onto his side and felt an arm rest across his waist.

Bdubs was asleep in no time and, even though he had just woken up, Doc followed soon after. He hadn’t slept that well, he argued for himself, just before darkness drew her gentle black curtains around him.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> With the help of the lovely AaronAmpora I've thrown together a playlist for Doc/Bdubs [here!](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0YWxtxAIMzild4hMcGahjq)
> 
> Sorry I didn't post last week, I was writing Grian/Mumbo/Iskall smut that is posted on this account as well. If you haven't read it yet and it looks interesting to you check it out!
> 
> Also, you may have seen that this has become part of a series! I will be posting the first chapter of a fic that I mentally call "gee, Grian! How come mom lets you have three boyfriends?" next week

The heat of mid-afternoon eventually woke him. 

Doc sighed, rubbing his face on the pillow. He felt sticky with sweat and the dried remains of his ill-advised tryst with Bdubs - probably should have done a more thorough clean-up afterwards. There weren’t arms around him anymore which meant Bdubs must have left, and hopefully he had cleaned himself too. 

Actually, that wasn’t the only thing Doc felt - or didn’t feel - for that matter.

He tried wiggling the fingers on his right arm and found it unresponsive, the usual feedback from the wires nonexistent. Doc pressed his face further into the pillow, knowing _exactly_ what had happened and just not wanting to face the reality quite yet.

After a moment, Doc opened his eyes and glared down at the empty space at his side.

Bdubs had stolen his _fucking_ arm. 

_Again_.

\- - -

“Oh my - he’s not going to be happy with you, Bubbles.”

Bdubs laughed, toying with the fingers of the metal arm he held. 

“Oh, definitely not! I’m counting on it, in fact!"

Keralis gave him a look, and Bdubs knew he was seeing the hickies and bite marks that littered his neck. Bdubs smirked, tugging down the collar of his shirt to show them off better. 

“Well,” Keralis laughed, “at least you know what’s coming for you.”

“ _Please_ , this isn’t the first time I’ve taken this,” he snorted, “when he finds it I’m sure I’ll receive a _thorough_ tongue-lashing.” 

Bdubs winked and Keralis rolled his eyes, gesturing at the man and his illegal arm.

“If I didn’t know you as well I’d be warning you away from this action,” he said, “but I do, my bubbles, I do. So, where are we putting this thing?”

Bdubs sighed, sitting back against the wall. Keralis’ little construction barracks were nice, cool and comfy and an ocean away from Doc - an ideal place to rest his head for a few days while his neighbour fumed. He laid the arm across his knees and patted the warm metal like it was an old friend.

“I was thinking the mooshroom island? Put it up for sale and see if he can get it before anyone else does,” Bdubs smirked at Keralis’ answering giggles, “thought you’d like that!”

“Oh yes I do - Bubbles! That’s amazing!”

“Thank you!”

Keralis giggled some more, clearly picturing the look on Doc’s face when he sees it hung up on the shopping island. Bdubs slid the arm onto the floor and patted the spot next to him, catching Keralis’ hand. The other man allowed himself to be pulled forward and knelt on the bed with a smile.

“Aw, has your beautiful face missed me?” he asked.

“Well, it’s been a while, so I figured…” Bdubs trailed off with a suggestive waggle of his eyebrows. “If you don’t want to get involved again I get it - Tango made it clear what he thinks when he came over.”

“You know I could never turn that face down. I’m already involved anyway, might as well make it even more fun.”

Bdubs pulled him in for a quick hug then pressed their mouths together, tugging at Keralis’ lip playfully with his teeth. Keralis hummed and kissed back for a moment while his hands worked at Bdubs’ pants. He snorted as his hands brushed against already hardening flesh, pulling cloth down and away for immediate access.

“Do you just walk around hard, my bubbles?” 

“Not my fault so many hermits are hunks,” Bdubs joked, sliding down the wall to lay flat and shifting his hips so Keralis had more room, “I can’t help it!”

Keralis laughed, bending over so he could run his tongue up the length of his cock before swallowing him all the way down in one practiced motion. Bdubs let loose a sigh as the warm mouth enveloped him, head falling back against the sheets. Keralis’ head bobbed, licking expertly along his cock and under the head, then back down with a moan, drawing a gasp from Bdubs each time. 

Fingers cupped his balls, squeezing in time with the movements of Keralis’ head, and Bdubs shuddered. Glancing down, he saw the other man’s hand disappear beneath him, arm moving. He moaned at the visual of Keralis jerking himself off as he sucked his cock.

Bdubs felt his orgasm approaching swiftly, hips twitching up in tiny thrusts as he panted. Keralis hummed encouragingly, mouth moving faster. He tensed, a shiver running down his spine as he came, Keralis swallowing it all down. Bdubs lay, boneless, as he stroked himself to completion, cum staining the sheets. 

They breathed together for a minute before Keralis groaned, rolling onto his side.

“My bed,” he cried, “oh no!”

“I think that’s the third set of sheets I’ve ruined in as many days,” Bdubs said.

“Euck.”

\- - -

Sundown found them on the mooshroom island, carefully constructing the mini shop for Doc’s arm. Every couple of minutes Bdubs looked around, eyes peeled for the resident cyborg in case he decided to make a last-minute shopping trip. But he didn’t appear, and he and Keralis were able to finish the stand without issue. 

As Bdubs placed the final fence post, slipping a lead around the arm and tying it in place, he heard the tell-tale sound of rockets and spun to find where they were coming from. To his relief, it was not Doc he saw approaching them, but instead the lighter green shirt of Iskall who swooped in low and came to land a few feet away. 

“Keralis! Bdubs! What are you up to, my dudes?” he asked, peering closer at their build.

“Oh, you know. Just a little revenge!” Bdubs said, wrapping his arm around Keralis’ shoulders. 

Iskall read their sign and burst out laughing. He clutched his side as he bent over, wheezing. Bdubs and Keralis shared a grin.

“That’s amazing,” he snickered, “I hope Doc sees it before some of the other hermits - he might never get it back!”

Once Iskall caught his breath he stepped back, wiping tears from his eye with a smile.

“Alright, dudes. I’ve gotta grab my stuff and get back to my base. I’ve got a whiny hobbit that needs taking care of.”

“Ooh, good luck with that!”

“Later!”

He took off, and Bdubs and Keralis took one final look at their work before they began the walk back to the portal. 

“How long before Doc finds it, you think,” Keralis asked.

“Oh, at least two days,” Bdubs snickered, “he’s always been terrible about seeing the obvious.”

“Want to stay at my place till then? I know your sweet face has problems sleeping alone.”

“You’re an angel, Keralis. Remind me why we never dated?”

“I love you but not like that?” Keralis said, “we can’t do the romance. Friends with benefits and no bouquets.”

“Right, right,” Bdubs sighed jokingly, “what a shame.”

Keralis laughed and tugged him along through the portal, leaving the stand and it’s bounty for the next lucky buyer.

_Hermits!_

_For the price of 1 diamond block_

_This exquisite piece of redstone machinery can be yours!_

_Along with a favour_

_From the hand of Doc himself._


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HOO BOY this chapter is almost 3.5k words somehow - I think it's because every character wanted to have their say. *slaps chapter* this bad boy can fit so many fucking people in it!  
> First time writing Beef or Etho so I hope I did a decent job, but I think as a Canadian I have a distinct advantage XP
> 
> Also good news! I have fully planned the end out now and am hype to write it! Tags will probably be added with the next chapter, so keep an eye out for that!
> 
> The song from the playlist I think fits best with this one is Monster You Made >83c

The morning he awoke with no arm set the tone for the rest of the day.

Doc had searched the room thoroughly, leaving no block untouched as he went. When his arm didn’t turn up, the rest of the house joined the chaos. From the furthest reaches of his unfinished roof to the basement with his new redstone project he swept, and yet there was no sign of the arm. 

He glared over the fence at Bdubs’, watching for any sign of the other man. After twenty minutes of nothing, Doc guessed it was safe and made his way over, continuing his search. 

The other half of the house was empty, no sign that Bdubs had been there in the last couple of hours, and no hidden areas where his arm could be hidden. Not even the basement bedroom had any hints!

He headed to the mines. 

Doc checked every nook and cranny, went down every branch of the strip mine, and left no stone unturned - the mine was a dead end. He ended up going as far to dig up some of the dirt around the split house in an effort to find  _ anything _ . Nothing. The sun was starting to set and he had no clues, no idea where to look next.

_ What had Bdubs done with his arm _ ?

He growled, nails digging gouges into his palm. This was not the first time this had happened - but they had been married before, hadn’t they? It had been more of a game back then, even if it annoyed Doc to no end, and Bdubs had never left him down a limb for more than a couple of hours. 

It was his weird way of punishing him, Doc remembered. 

He sat down on the rough wood of the porch, staring out at the dark bay. If this was Bdubs’ revenge, he could be without his arm for a long time. Dammit, he had shit to do! He pulled out his communicator, staring at Bdubs’ name in the contacts before scrolling away. 

<Docm77>Hey guys. May need some help locating a missing object.

He only had to wait a minute before there was a response.

<VintageBeef> Oh no! 

<VintageBeef> What did you lose?

<Ethoslab> sure thing

<Docm77> Arm.

<Ethoslab> again?

<VintageBeef> Again??

<Ethoslab> what did you do to piss him off

<VintageBeef> Isn’t it usually on a tall shelf?

<VintageBeef> Or in a couch?

<Docm77> Yes but it’s not this time. I’ve looked everywhere.

<Ethoslab> thats rough buddy

<Ethoslab> we can meet at beefs in the morning?

<VintageBeef> Yeah! Come on over to the Hacienda!

<Ethoslab> plan over breakfast

<Docm77> Alright see you then.

<Docm77> Thanks.

He put his communicator away with a sigh. He wished they could do something  _ now _ , but the mobs were starting to come out and he wouldn’t want Beef or Etho getting injured just because he had a little problem. Even if they could respawn, it was never fun watching a friend get hurt. 

Doc rubbed absently at the empty socket of his shoulder, tucking a few stray wires that his arm usually hid back into place. At least Bdubs knew enough not to damage anything…

The loud hiss in his ear caught him completely by surprise, leaping to his feet and whirling to face the sizzling creeper. It must have snuck up the porch behind him while he was thinking and he cursed his lack of attention, quickly putting distance between himself and the monster. Doc grabbed for a weapon, instinctively pulling out a bow so he could have space in case it blew.

He realized his mistake when he went to shoot, simply holding the unloaded weapon in front of him while his brain caught up with what he had done. 

“Fuck,” he spat, throwing it down and reaching for his sword, but it was too late. 

Bright, flashing light shone in his face and then pain rocketed through him, sharp with shrapnel scratches and burning with heat. One last breath escaped his lungs with an ashy wheeze - and then he woke up in his bed upstairs.

Doc shouted in frustration, burying his face in a pillow. He just wanted to lay there, oblivious to the world for a while, but he had to go and clean up the mess that the creeper had surely made and get his stuff before it disappeared. Standing up with a groan, he made his way downstairs, paused for a moment, then grabbed his redstone shulker.

An eye for an eye, right?

\- - -

Pale morning dawn painted the stairway to Bdubs’ basement with soft light, stirring Doc from his work. He glanced up, wiping the red dust from his hands with a dirty rag, and checked the time. Perfect, he was still on-track to meet with Beef and Etho. 

Smirking, he replaced the wood panel at the foot of the large bed, making sure there was nothing out of place. He couldn’t very well steal one of Bdubs’ limbs, but Doc could give him as rude of an awakening as he got. 

He put away what remained of his redstone gear then hopped back over to his half of the house to return the shulker and grab his elytra. He tried to shrug into the shoulder straps but found it slipping off on his right side, unable to stay on thanks to the lack of arm. 

Doc closed his eyes, taking a deep, calming breath as he tried to not let his rising temper burst. It had been years since he last needed to adjust anything to work one-handed and he didn’t have anything he could scrap together, at least not now. He had places to be! Things to do! He didn’t have time for Bdubs’  _ bullshit _ .

His teeth bared, he threw the elytra into a chest with a thud. He should still have a boat down on the shore, he could get to Beef’s and not be too late. Doc clambered down the rough-hewn rocks and gravel, finding the boat bobbing among the kelp. He sat down in it with a heavy sigh and tried to figure out how to paddle.

<Docm77> I may be a little late. 

What felt like hours later, he washed up on the smooth sand of Beef’s beach, his skin hot and beaded with sweat. The hull of the boat scraped against the shore as Doc dropped the oars clenched tightly in one hand. He stood, stepping out of the wooden craft that wobbled beneath him, feeling the cool ocean air against his face. 

Beef’s vacation town was really starting to take shape, he observed, taking in the repaired buildings and newly-woven awnings. It was nice to see the work of his friends, their creations taking shape. 

Doc walked through the still-vacant village, keeping an eye out for Beef or Etho while admiring the craftsmanship all around him. He heard the crunch of sand underfoot and spun to face the noise, alert in case of another creeper. What he got, instead, was an armful of muscle.

“Doc,” Beef cried, crushing the green skinned man in a hug, “how’s it going, bud! How’s the arm?”

He wheezed, patting him on the back as he was released. Doc smiled at the grinning bearded man, his positivity infectious.

“Hey Beef. Could be better, could be better. That’s what I need you for, huh?”

Beef chuckled and waved him along, the loose sand of the beach giving way to lush green grass and a vegetable garden nestled between the town and the sprawled architecture of the ‘Hacienda.’ The pale yellow stone of the walls and the more vibrant roof could have been an eyesore, but they complimented each other, drawing your gaze and allowing you to see all of it. Doc should ask for lessons. 

“This is looking great, man,” he said.

“Thank you - it’s getting there for sure! Come on, Etho’s in the dining room,” he led Doc into the foyer, “he made pancakes.”

The interior was… something else, Doc decided, almost tempted to shield his eyes from how bright everything was. Had he - had Beef used gold blocks for some of it!? 

Doc followed Beef through to a storage room, the flashy patterns continuing even in there, and paused when they reached the doorway to the next room. His mouth opened and closed like a gasping fish. The long table with high-backed chairs was one thing, but the glittering crystal chandelier and gold plates was a lot to take in. Doc barely noticed Etho at the far end, putting pancakes on those plates. 

“It’s…” he wasn’t quite sure how to finish the sentence.

“Opulent. Opulent is the word you’re looking for,” Beef pulled him into the room, “and thank you!”

Etho rolled his eyes over his mask, clearly used to those words. He sat down and gestured for the other two to join him, the food still steaming.

“They’re only a little burnt,” Etho told Doc, “there were two of us keeping an eye on them.”

Doc grinned and sat, covering his plate in syrup and used his fork to carve pieces off. The pancakes were a little crispy and misshapen, but he thought it might be one of the best meals he’d ever had. Thinking back, Doc wasn’t sure if he’d eaten a good meal since they’d moved here. 

The three of them sat in comfortable silence after the meal, stomachs full and satisfied. Beef suddenly snickered, getting their attention.

“You guys ever  _ wash gold _ before?”

They blinked down at the sticky plates before them, laughter bubbling in their chests at the idea of this precious metal having been  _ eaten _ off of. Doc stood, smile on his face as he stacked their plates.

“I’m about to,” he scooted the plates to the edge of the table so he could get a good grip on them, “thanks for breakfast, guys.”

“Hey, hey - no,” Beef pushed his chair back, “you can’t wash  _ or _ dry right now, man.”

“Beef’ll wash, I’ll dry,” Etho said, leading the way into an unfinished kitchen. He took the plates from Doc and set them in a cauldron.

“Why do I have to wash?”

“Because I cooked.”

Doc wanted to protest, but knew they wouldn’t listen, their minds already set. He listened to the two bicker amiably back and forth, accepting the dried plates in his hand and returning them to the table. Etho fixed him with a look when he came back, interrupting Beef’s tirade about Ghast heads, of all things.

“So, your arm. When’d he take it?” 

“... Yesterday afternoon.”

“That’s. Unusually long, right?” Beef asked, watching Doc nod his confirmation. “And you haven’t found it yet?”

“I’ve looked everywhere,” Doc rubbed at his face tiredly, “it’s not hidden in any of the usual places. I need somewhere to start before I have to tear apart every block of the server.”

Etho hummed, eyes closing as he thought. Beef put his chin in his hand, staring at Doc. The cyborg fought not to squirm under his gaze.

“What happened?”

Doc grunted, not looking at him. Beef and Etho knew enough about their past to fill in the pieces, and he didn’t really feel like talking about it right now. They didn’t need to know the specifics about what he had done, what Bdubs had done, or how their feuds were reaching new levels. He just needed his arm back. 

He didn’t answer Beef.

“Doc -” he began with a sigh, but was cut off by a soft word from Etho.

“Beef.”

The two shared a look that Doc couldn’t comprehend, Beef’s shoulder dropping slightly with a nod. 

“Keralis is your neighbour, right Beef?” Etho continued, “he might have a hint about what Bdubs did with it.”

Doc considered it - he knew they were pretty close, and it was a sound idea.

“It’s as good a place to start as any. Let me -” Doc’s communicator dinged. He pulled it out, scanning over the message before his eyes widened, rereading the message to make sure he was seeing it correctly.

<Renthedog> Hey bro saw a new shop in the Cowmercial District. The sign said something about you? Did you make it?

<Docm77> No.

<Docm77> Where???

<Renthedog> By Joe’s road permit shop-thing.

<Docm77> I’ll be right there.

<Renthedog> What’s going on man? You good?

He shoved his communicator in his pocket, brow furrowed. What was this? If this was Bdubs, what had he done?

“I need to get to the shopping district,” Doc said, “can one of you guys help me boat there? It’ll take too long on my own.”

“Uh, Doc? Aren’t you forgetting something?” Etho asked, looking at him as he headed for the door.

“What?” he snapped.

“Wouldn’t a Nether portal be easier?” Doc stopped in his tracks, face slowly twisting into a grimace.

“Did you,” Beef struggled to keep a straight face, “did you boat all the way here? With one arm?”

“...”

“Wh -”

“Shut up,” he gritted out, “Not. A. Word. Just show me where your portal is, please.”

Beef was still fighting a smile, but he led Doc to his portal, Etho trailing along behind him. The violet glow of the particles washed over the white sand as they approached, the sound of magic in their ears. Doc moved to step through but stopped at a touch to his shoulder. He turned, meeting Etho’s steady, mismatched gaze. 

“What?” he asked when the masked man remained silent.

“Are you okay?”

“Fine, but I gotta go. Thanks for the breakfast Etho, Beef. I’ll see you later, guys.”

Purple light filled his vision as the portal began to transport him across realms, but he could still see the concerned look the others shared. He saw Beef’s lips moving, saying something to Etho, but the rush of magic covered all sound, and then he was in the Nether.

He jogged over the ridged bedrock, following the simple trail from Beef’s portal to the mooshroom island’s, hopping into the obsidian doorway. When he emerged on the other side his eyes zeroed in on a simple wood structure beside Joe’s plot that had not been there the last time he had been there. 

Doc approached it in trepidation, unsure of what he might find. What he saw were a bunch of signs, an empty chest, and broken string where  _ something _ had been attached. He read the signs, then read them again, the spark of annoyance he had felt upon waking up without his arm blossoming into an inferno. His fist clenched, hot anger at what had been done turning his knuckles white. 

His arm wasn’t there, but it had been - someone had bought it and was now waiting to hold him to this  _ favour _ . A favour  _ he _ hadn’t promised!

He grabbed his axe.

It wasn’t the easiest, especially with his left hand, but he still tore down the signs with a few quick, brutal chops. He hacked the rest of it apart, splitting the chest open and breaking the fence post poles in two. Doc stepped back, splinters covering his fingers from his carelessness. Satisfied with the ruins of the booth, he put the axe back into his pack and turned to go.

Now he knew what had been done he had to find Bdubs, get him to explain himself and make him give the arm back - make him deal with whoever had bought it.

As he approached the main road a figure caught his eye as they left Keralis’ book shop.

From this distance it was hard to tell, but Doc would put his money on it being the man himself. Perfect, he had wanted to talk to Keralis and see if he knew where Bdubs was. Doc’s shoes pounded on the cobblestone as he ran over, the other man looking up at his approach. 

“Hello Doc! Why you in such a rush, huh?” Keralis called, a grin splitting his face, “you wanna buy a book?”

“Keralis,” he panted as he came to a stop in front of the bookstore, “where’s Bdubs?”

“Ah, well. He’s around -”

“Keralis. Where. Is Bdubs.”

He looked up, wide eyes taking in Doc’s expression. Keralis must have seen the fury in his face because he took a small step back, hands raised.

“Whoa, hey hey look into my eyes, nothing but my eyes! No need for the bad feelings, why not take some deep breaths -”

“Hey Keralis,” Bdubs’ head popped out from around the corner of the shop, “I got your - oh. Hi Doc.”

“Bdubs,” he growled, “where is my arm.”

Bdubs strolled down the steps, unconcerned as he came to stand next to Keralis, the other man stepping back a bit so he wasn’t in the way.

“Why?” he asked, “did you lose it?”

“Don’t lie to me, I saw the ‘shop.’ Where is it?” Doc struggled to keep his composure, his blood thumping in his ears.

“Hmm, I’m not too sure. It’s anonymous, Doc. Guess you’ll find out when they come to collect their favour, right?” he smirked, shrugging. 

Doc’s mouth opened but no words came out, speechless at Bdubs’ inability to give a shit. Frustrated, he threw his hand up in the air, letting it smack against his leg when it came back down.

“Well,” Bdubs said, turning, “I think it’s time we head out, don’t you Keralis?”

Doc’s hand shot out, grabbing Bdubs by the elbow to stop him from leaving. He bared his teeth in a grimace and pulled to get Bdubs’ eyes on him, the other man frowning. Bdubs’ eyes flicked up, over Doc’s shoulder, but were back on him quickly enough that he dismissed it. 

“Ow! Let go Doc, you’re hurting me!” Doc rolled his eyes at the whine - he was barely holding him there. Bdubs widened his eyes in an attempt to look sad.

“Bdubs, this is serious -” 

He was suddenly shoved backwards, a smaller form having swooped between them and planted hands on Doc’s chest. He flailed, fighting to keep his balance, and his eyes fell on the man before him, sandy hair wild from flight and face nearly as red as his sweater.

“What the hell Doc!” Grian shouted, his voice rough with righteous fury. He stood between Doc and Bdubs, feathered elytra wings spread as if in defense.

“Grian,” Doc started, immediately cut off by the other man.

“Shut up! Who do you think you are? That’s not okay!”

“I was just -”

“Just what! Grabbing somebody who didn’t want you too!?”

Bdubs met his gaze over Grian’s shoulder, a satisfied smirk on his lips. He shuffled away, drawing Keralis to his side, hand drifting low on his back, brushing the top of his ass. Bdubs looked over his shoulder as they walked and shot a wink at Doc, leaving him at Grian’s mercy. 

His heart twisted, aching deep in his chest at the sight, the knowledge that he had done this on purpose. It wasn’t a big deal - this wasn’t new - but each beat of his heart  _ burned  _ as he watched Bdubs walk away. While he stayed. Again. 

Doc flinched as Grian gestured in his face, tuning back into what the blond was saying.

“- I don’t care what your relationship was! What do you have to say for yourself!?”

“I,” he swallowed, throat dry. What could he say? What  _ was _ he doing?

“Grian! My man, what is going on?” a cheerful voice called, running up to join them. Dressed in his now-usual shipwreck clothes and sunburn, Ren was smiling, but his eyes flickered between the two in concern.

“Nothing,” Grian replied, stepping back and relaxing his wings from their defensive position, “just having a conversation about some  _ unchecked aggression _ .”

Doc ducked his head, refusing to meet anyone’s gaze.

“Uh-huh. Well, I think I can take it from here. C’mon Doc,” Ren’s gentle hands on Doc’s shoulders leading him back toward the portals. When they were far enough away from the angry builder, Ren stopped them, turning him so he could look at his face.

“What happened? You never responded to my messages, and then I find you being yelled at by Grian of all people? Are you okay?”

“I - Bdubs sold my arm to-to someone, and I wanted to talk but he wouldn’t, so I grabbed his arm and Grian saw and,” Doc pulled at his hair, “I just want my arm back, man.”

Ren sighed and rubbed his temples, taking in the information.

“Okay, I can talk to Grian. He hasn’t been here long enough to know how you guys are,” he paused, nudging Doc so their eyes met. Ren’s gaze softened. “Are you okay?”

Doc breathed, his emotions a whirlwind inside of him.

“I don’t know what’s going on anymore…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fic hit 100 kudos and 1400 hits this past week and I wanted to take the time to say THANK YOU
> 
> From the bottom of my heart, I never imagined this silly idea I had one day would appeal to so many people. ilu <3


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Very porny chapter, starts with Bdubs/Keralis intercrural just as a heads up!
> 
> I am quite proud of this chapter. The ball is rolling folks~
> 
> I have updated the tags, no wild changes, but it reflects the story a bit better now I think.
> 
> Bit of a cliffhanger end, whoops.  
> We getting into it now boys.
> 
> Also, I am sorry. . . . .
> 
> WARNING: This chapter contains content that could possibly be read as coerced consent, though it is not intended that way. Please proceed with caution if you are sensitive to such subjects.

Bdubs’ skin was sticky with sweat, his panting breath heating the air between them. He could see goosebumps on the back of Keralis’ neck, blush high on his cheeks, as his chest pressed up against the other man's back. Bdubs’ hand gripped Keralis’ hip, holding him in place as he thrust languidly.

His cock slid easily between his lubed thighs, the skin soft and warm. Keralis moaned quietly as he brushed against the bottom of his cock and balls, and he squeezed his legs together, earning a whispered curse from Bdubs. His hold tightened on Keralis as he sped up the pace, hips snapping forward and back. Bdubs mouthed along the taught muscles of the shoulder in front of his face, nose trailing up Keralis’ neck and into his hair, smelling the faint blueberry scent of the soap he knew the other used. 

He saw Keralis move a hand down, arm moving as he began to jerk himself off, and he could feel his own cock bump against those moving fingers. Keralis puffed encouragement and Bdubs could hear him getting close, so he let himself go, body moving of its own accord to seek its pleasure. 

The thighs around his dick tensed as Keralis came with a small sound, muscles quivering. Bdubs let himself thrust deep into the hold, savouring the feeling of the soft skin and hard muscle along his cock. He felt Keralis relax, but worked his body in time with Bdubs’ movements until he was coming against his skin. 

Keralis sighed and Bdubs disentangled their bodies, flopping onto his back with a groan. The other grabbed a towel and began to wipe himself down with a bit of water, working at the bedsheets as well until there was nothing but a damp spot to show what they had done. 

He watched as Keralis picked up his underwear and slid them on before coming to lay beside him. Bdubs got an eye roll when he turned to try and cuddle up to him, his arm gently pushed off but hand taken instead. 

“You know I love your face,” Keralis said, “but these barracks don’t have AC and you are very clingy, my bubbles.”

“Ugh, you are the least cuddly person I have ever slept with! A guy’s gotta be held sometimes, y’know,” Bdubs pouted. Even Doc had snuggled up to him...

“So dramatic, but I understand. If I be your date to the potluck next week will that satisfy you? I will even hold your hand, hmm?”

“Wait, what potluck?” Bdubs asked, confused.

“Shishwamyvoid’s all-hermit potluck,” Keralis replied, turning onto his side, “so he can check in on us and make sure we are socializing.” 

“Oh yeah, I forgot that was coming up. Sure! Let’s go together. I’ll make some soup or whatever.”

Bdubs heard some faint dings from the floor and he frowned, sitting up and picking up his pants as he did. His communicator clattered noisily on the wooden planks, screen lighting up to show a few missed messages. He picked it up, squinting as he read them, and a slow smile crept over his face. 

“Well, well, well,” he chuckled, “I think someone’s getting desperate.” 

<Docm77> Bdubs. Where is my arm?

<Docm77> Please.

<Docm77> I will buy it back.

<BDoubleO100> hmm..

<Docm77> Bdubs.

<BDoubleO100> for a price.

<Docm77> Name it.

<BDoubleO100> i’ll come over soon and we’ll discuss it.

<Docm77> I’m at Ren’s island. Give me some time to get back. 

<BDoubleO100> don’t take too long now, doc~

“It has been three days,” Keralis said, reading over his shoulder, “I’m surprised he hasn’t found it yet. Who has it, bubbles?”

Bdubs stood, tugging his pants on and reaching for his shirt, eyes flashing with mischief.

“I have no idea! That’s the best part!” He laughed, ignoring the small pull of worry that wormed its way into his heart, a voice telling him he was being cruel. He silenced those thoughts with a shake of his head - Doc hated him anyway, what was the point if he didn’t get to have some fun?

Keralis was frowning up at him, and Bdubs could see the thoughts working behind those wide eyes of his. 

“What?”

“That’s not very honest - what if he catches on?”

“He won’t,” Bdubs dismissed with a wave of his hand, “And I’ll find the arm later, give it back. No harm done!”

The other just hummed noncommittally, laying back against the pillows. Bdubs sighed as he put his shirt on.

“I know you don’t  _ approve _ ,” he told Keralis, “but the jerk deserves it! Pushy asshole…”

“Just,” Keralis paused, thinking over his words carefully, “be careful, bubbles.”

_ What does that mean? _ Bdubs thought, but smiled brightly and waved as he left Keralis’ construction site and headed for the two halves of the house he was calling home. 

His elytra made quick work of the journey and as he touched down on the soft grass he saw that he had beaten Doc there. Perfect. He had time to set up.

It only took him about ten minutes of fiddling in the bedroom to come up with a design that worked, but by then he could hear the familiar rush of magic from the Nether portal. He gave a quick tug to the wood then, when satisfied it was stable, bounced down the stairs to meet the cyborg.

Doc had stepped out of the portal and was rubbing his face when Bdubs made it downstairs, looking up at him in surprise when he heard the footsteps.

“You’re late,” Bdubs told him, hands on his hips.

“There wasn’t a specific time we were meeting. Now, how much do you want?”

“ _ Diamonds _ ? Please,” Bdubs scoffed, “I know you barely have any.”

“Then what,” Doc growled, scowling, “do you want? If you just wanted to come and gloat, fine. You got one over me. Where is it, Bdubs?”

“Oh, hush. I don’t want your money, but there is something you can give me. Even if you were terribly tardy, tsk tsk Doc. For shame.”

“What. Do. You want,” Doc bit out through his teeth, glaring down at him. 

“Oh honey,” he purred, reaching out a hand to rest on Doc’s chest, “just a little control. Think you could handle that - me in charge, for once?”

Doc’s fingers wrapped around his wrist, expression vaguely confused.

“That’s it?”

“If you think you can deal with it,” Bdubs shrugged and pulled back out of his grasp, “we’ll see how well you do.”

“That’s easy! Dammit, Bdubs I - you - you can  _ ask _ ! Just,” Doc cut himself off, “whatever. Let’s get this over with.”

Bdubs stepped back up the stairs with a quirk of his eyebrows. “Come on then.” It was silent but for his own footsteps for a moment before he heard Doc sigh and follow after. 

He grinned as Doc entered the bedroom, quickly seeing the small changes he made and scanning them over, lingering on the single piece of rope. Bdubs grabbed the front pieces of his lab coat and pulled him close, savouring the flare anger he was sure he saw in those eyes. 

“You’re safeword’s still the same, right?” Doc nodded in reply, “good.”

Bdubs turned him and shoved, sending him right onto the bed and immediately he was on and straddling Doc’s thighs. He had expected resistance, but Doc went seemingly willingly, his hand only reaching out for Bdubs as he sat on him. Bdubs caught his arm with a tight grip, shaking his head. 

“Uh-uh! No touching, honey,” he sang, bringing the hand up and pinning it to the bed while he reached for the rope. 

He made quick work of it, tying Doc’s wrist to the makeshift post he had put up on the other side of the bed, leaving the other man flat on his back, knees bent and feet hanging, with his single arm above his head. There was some slack in the rope, unfortunately, but it would be enough to keep Doc restrained. 

Doc twitched beneath him and he looked down to see a faint blush darkening the green of his face. Bdubs’ fingertips trailed down his arm and over his chest, smoothing over the tensed muscles of his abdomen. He could feel raised scars beneath his touch, some old and familiar to him, but there were many that were new - when had he gotten those? He moved his hand lower, between their bodies, and cupped the hard shape of him through his pants. 

“Hard already? Wow, aren’t you naughty.”

Doc bared his teeth and growled up at him, but Bdubs silenced him with a firm squeeze, his head falling back onto the mattress. Bdubs released his grip and stood, shucking off his own clothes first then undoing Doc’s pants and pulling them down to his knees. 

“Do you even own underwear?” he asked. Doc huffed but didn’t answer.

Bdubs sat astride him once more, but this time he bent forward and bit down hard on the exposed skin of his chest. Doc shouted, body rolling in an attempt to get Bdubs off.

“Hey,” he snarled, “what the hell, man!?”

“Answer me,” Bdubs ordered, freeing his teeth, “I expect cooperation,  _ Doc _ .”

“Ugh - fine! Yes, but I never wear it. Happy now?” Bdubs almost laughed at the expression on his face - glaring up at him but flushed and achingly hard. Didn’t exactly intimidate. 

He hummed, reaching for the bottle of lube he had stashed here earlier. He poured some into his hand and grabbed Doc’s cock, getting a hiss from the cold temperature. It warmed up as he stroked, starting firm at the base and loosening his hold until his fingers just brushed against the head, then back down. Doc cursed, arm straining against its restraints.

“What was that?” Bdubs smiled innocently, stilling his hand.

“F-fuck. Bdubs -”

“If you want it, I think you’ll have to beg.” He tightened his hold on the base, squeezing slightly.

“Please,” Doc hissed. 

“Come on, you can do better than that,” Bdubs rolled his hips forward, “you’re at my mercy, afterall.”

“Please touch me harder, touch me more. Please.” 

Bdubs moved his hand again, but this time his strokes were more heavy-handed, tight around the shaft. His thumb rubbed over the head at the end of each stroke, coating it with lube and precum. Doc groaned beneath him, trying to roll his hips up into the touch. Bdubs slid forward until he could slot their dicks together, adjusting his hold so his hand was around both of them as much as it could be. 

He rubbed them together, biting his lip to keep from moaning - he had to enjoy the sounds Doc was making right now. The cyborg made short, aborted moans, almost hums in the back of his throat as he was touched. Bdubs could tell he was enjoying himself, building up to a nice orgasm, when he stopped, pulling his hand away. Doc blinked at him, confused and annoyed at the sudden lack of friction.

“Bdubs,” he started, but was cut off by Bdubs’ non-lubed hand reaching up and tangling itself in his hair. Bdubs pulled and watched the words die on his lips.

“Good,” he purred, his slick hand reaching behind him, “now ask me to fuck you.”

“Can you fuck me?” Doc breathed.

“Now beg. Beg for it Doc, beg for my sweet ass.”

“Please can you fuck me,” his eyes were wide, “please, Bdubs. Please fuck me.”

Bdubs’ fingers sank into his hole, the angle awkward but perfectly fine for opening himself up. He fucked himself on two, already loose from earlier, arching his back and panting. Doc was staring up at him, mouth open. Bdubs smirked down at him and scissored his fingers, his breath stuttering, and he watched Doc choke on a moan.

Satisfied, he withdrew his hand and shuffled forward, grabbing Doc’s cock and lining it up. He took a deep breath in, then sank down on it on the exhale, bearing down and down until it was seated fully within him. 

Doc’s head had fallen back again, a deep groan coming from his chest. Bdubs slid his hands up onto his chest, not caring about any of the lube on his fingers. He dug his nails into Doc’s skin, forcing the other man to look up at him.

“Yes,” Bdubs panted, “tell me how good it feels - how much you miss this.”

Bdubs lifted his hips a little then ground back down, fucking himself on Doc’s cock agonizingly slow. 

“Feels so good, love being inside of you,” Doc gasped. His muscles were straining, every inch of him wanting to move and take charge. His fingers clung desperately to the sheets. “I missed fucking you - being fucked by you, oh god - Bdubs!”

He had bounced himself again, faster this time. Bdubs clenched around the cock inside him, rolling his hips for all he was worth. He used his hold on Doc’s chest to push himself up until just the tip was still inside, drinking in Doc’s frustration. Bdubs fucked himself back open, tossing his head back and letting out a long moan as he pressed up against his prostate. He sped up the pace, riding Doc hard and fast, letting out little cries of pleasure.

Bdubs could see that Doc was getting close, breathing faster and legs shaking, so he sat forward suddenly, pulling his cock out of him. Doc growled, so hard and so close, but denied his release. Bdubs was nearly panting from the exertion - he was a little out of practice at this, he supposed. 

“Nuh uh-uh, my gorgeous honey buns,” he cooed, “this is for me. You don’t get to cum until I do.”

“Bdubs, please,” Doc grunted. His chest shone with sweat.

“Aw. I’ll give you a  _ little _ something.”

Bdubs pressed an open-mouthed kiss to Doc’s pec, tongue curling out to lathe over a dark nipple. He felt Doc shiver under his lips and grinned, biting down on the soft flesh. Doc jerked up with a cry, dislodging his mouth, but Bdubs just sat back with a laugh. 

“Now then, where were we?” he asked, rolling his hips and thrusting his cock against Doc’s hip, “ah, yes. You were telling me how you’ve never had a fuck like me.”

Doc gasped, moving his hips to try to get some attention to his neglected cock, but Bdubs kept just out of reach. 

“Yes,” Doc eventually spit out, nearly breathless, “best fuck of my life. Never anyone better.”

“Mmm,” Bdubs leaned forward, fingers grasping Doc and resting him against his hole, “good. Now, tell me how much you hate me.”

He waited, eager to hear the words come from his mouth, but instead he was met with silence. 

Bdubs looked up, but Doc’s head was to the side, hiding the organic side of his face. He huffed, letting go of his cock to grab the other man’s chin, forcing him to look him in the face.

“Tell me,” he breathed, a vicious grin on his face. 

Doc looked up at him, lips pressed together in a thin line. Bdubs blinked, mouth falling slack as he saw the depth of emotion in his eyes. 

He saw what Doc wasn’t saying.

Oh.

_ Oh. _


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HOOOKAY  
> This chapter got long af so I ended up splitting it up - don't worry, you will get the other chapter tomorrow (and will wish to break my knees - I'm sorry)
> 
> At the time of posting this has more than 2k hits and 200 kudos and I am absolutely blown away by the response <3<3<3  
> I'm just... gonna go cry tears of love alright

Fuck.

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

Doc listened as Bdubs scooped his stuff up and left, scrambling down the stairs and out of the house. He hadn’t been able to read his face - confusion, yes, but  _ something _ else. Something he’d never seen on Bdubs before, and he had no idea what it meant.

“Fuck,” he breathed.

What had he done? What sort of ammunition had he given Bdubs now? 

What would he do now that Bdubs knew he still loved him?

He remembered he was still mostly naked when a chill breeze blew through the bedroom. Doc shivered, rolling onto his side and eyeing the rope still attached to his wrist. The knot was simple, at least, and he had enough slack that he could untie it from the post. Afterwards, he brought his hand to his mouth and used his teeth to undo it from himself, the rope falling onto the bed. He shimmied back into his pants and fumbled with the button for a second until it popped into place. Then, he sat up and just stayed there, head in his hands.

And the afternoon had been fine - fun, even. God, sure he was annoyed that Bdubs had to make the whole thing so damn  _ complicated _ , but it was a nice change of pace. He enjoyed when the other man took charge - he just wished the stubborn idiot would learn to use his words and  _ say something _ rather than make a game out of it. Also, that he wouldn’t make him wait so long. Next time, Doc was going to turn the tables on  _ him, _ and not let anyone interrupt his interrogations like Grian had - get his arm back right away and then fuck Bdubs into the ground.

_ Fuck. Grian _ . He probably hated him now.

Next time? What the fuck was he thinking. There wasn’t going to be a next time! Not now that Bdubs knew…

Doc didn’t think of himself as someone who was very in-touch with his emotions - he felt them as they came and rarely dwelt on them afterwards - but the feeling in his chest was like a storm brewing, cloudy and swollen and ready to burst.

Why had he come back?

Doc was - he was  _ fine _ ! Really! When Bdubs had left he had been angry, and maybe a little sad, but he got over it. He changed. He was a different person now, or trying to be. Bdubs’ return had him all twisted up, returning to their old ways like  _ nothing _ was different and no time had passed. 

He could feel the familiar frustration that came with being near Bdubs bubbling up again.

Had he - had he actually ever gotten over him?

The answer was looking more and more like no. 

And Bdubs knew it.

Doc’s fingers gripped his hair and pulled. He couldn’t let this get to him, he just had to prepare himself for the worst. Bdubs was probably telling Keralis right at this moment and they were laughing at him - the pitiful man who still loved his ex. Who still went along with his games and let himself be riled up just to be close to him - just so they could still fuck.

_ What am I doing _ , he cursed at himself,  _ this is so fucked up and it’s my fault _ .

If he told Keralis, then surely the word would spread from there and everyone Bdubs had slept with would know and they’d tell everyone else. 

Did anyone even like him anymore?

Or had his image and status among the hermits been damaged so much from his sad attempts at keeping hold of Bdubs? Would he be better off just leaving?

Doc’s eyes slipped shut and he slumped down on the bed, curling his legs up beside him. He stared at the slight marks around his wrist that the rope had left, wishing he could savour the memory of this encounter without it being soured by his traitorous feelings. 

He clenched and unclenched his hand, watching the skin stretch and relax, stretch and relax, stretch and -

\- - -

Doc found himself blinking awake in the early hours of the morning before the sun had risen. 

At first, he wasn’t sure what had woken him, the house quiet but for the heavy steps of the iron golems in the yard. He sat up, rubbing the sleep from his eyes, and saw something laying on the desk by the window - it was long and wrapped in tan fabric. 

He got up and approached it cautiously. Doc didn’t think it was dangerous, but you could never be too careful, so he found his sword and used it to gently poke and shift the parcel. When it didn’t explode or otherwise make a noise, he put the weapon away and tugged the cloth off. It thudded onto the table and the faint light filtering through the glass shone off of metal plates and redstone wiring.

His  _ arm _ .

Doc’s fingers wrapped around the solid metal wrist, satisfied when he could touch it and knew it was real and not a dream. 

He sat down heavily on the chair and pulled his tools from the drawers, setting them on the desk so he could prop the shoulder socket in place and re-hook the wires. Ideally he would have another person help him, but he didn’t want to bother anyone. Etho was his usual repairman, but Doc wasn’t going to interrupt him and Beef for a second morning in a row - they were probably more than done with his shit by now…

He carefully inserted and twisted the support bolt, securing and locking it in place with a press of his thumb. Now the hard part were the wires. Some were quite easy to reach and plug in one-handed, but the more sensitive ones were near impossible.

Doc growled as he fumbled at it for a while, feeling the small electrical shocks through his body as the metal fingers twitched periodically. It was getting incredibly frustrating, working on it alone.

There was a change in the clunk of the iron golems and he froze, ears straining to hear what was out there. Hans and Franz let out a pair of friendly barks as footsteps approached the house.

“Doc?” the normally bubbly voice of Ren called out, the words tinged with worry, “Are you here - Doc?”

He made his way over to the open side of the house, peering down at his visitor. Ren looked tired and there was a soft screech from above, the solitary Phantom circling overhead making it clear that Ren had been up the whole night. Thankfully, the creature wasn’t taking dives at the man, smart enough to wait until it’s flock had gathered and they could attack together. They wouldn’t get that chance.

Doc grabbed one of the junk pieces of cobble he always seemed to amass and wound back, snarling. He hurled the stone at the mob and it shrieked in pain and surprise, the noise drawing Ren’s attention up. The Phantom whirled, gliding off in another direction - probably to wait out the day and nurse it’s bruises - good. Doc nodded, then turned his gaze to Ren.

“Doc!”

“What are you doing here?”

“Me? You haven’t answered any of my messages since yesterday, man! Where have you been?” Ren asked, “I was worried that - you’ve been upset since Grian, and then you got a message and disappeared! I was looking  _ everywhere _ my dude.”

Doc turned his head away and swore under his breath.

“I thought you wouldn’t come if I asked for help,” he admitted, “you’ve already done so much.”

“Why wouldn’t I?”

“Mm,” Doc shrugged, “anyway. I could use an extra set of hands - come up?”

Ren stepped up onto the floor of the house and Doc went back to his desk, pulling a shulker box out to sit on and scooting the chair out for Ren. The other man peered around the corner and then made his way over when he spotted Doc past the flowing fabric hanging on the bedposts. 

“You got your arm back,” the fluffy ears atop his head twitched as he sat, taking hold of the pliers Doc handed him.

Doc hummed in reply, presenting his shoulder and the exposed wires. He trusted Ren to be able to do this, even if he had only done this a few times in the past - the man was a quick learner, if not inclined to redstone circuitry in general like he was.

Ren sighed heavily but got to work, plucking at the thin red lines and attaching them to the correct spots, hands stilling each time Doc twitched.

“Sorry,” he muttered as the metal hand clenched into a fist.

“It’s okay. The circuits are just reacting to the input, don’t worry.”

He continued tinkering in silence for a couple of minutes, worrying at his lip. Finally, Doc saw him draw in a deep breath.

“What happened, man?” he asked. Doc watched his ears droop under his scrutiny, his warm blue eyes flicking up to his and away. “You don’t have to tell me, but you seem preoccupied by something.”

Doc closed his eyes and rested his elbow on the desk, chin in his hand as he heaved a heavy sigh. He wanted to tell Ren, but the little voice in the back of his head insisted otherwise. 

_ He’s only friends with you because he feels sorry for you _ , that voice hissed,  _ he’s obligated to help you because he’s known you so long. If he found out just how much of a loser you are he’d never talk to you again. And Bdubs would be crawling into his bed again as soon as that happened. _

Doc shook his head, rubbing his face.

“Doc?”

“It’s nothing,” he lied, “just the usual stuff with Bdubs - you know.”

He couldn’t meet Ren’s gentle gaze so he just stared at the polished wood of the desk beside them, tracing the swirls and knots of the grain in his mind until Ren resumed working.

“Okay,” Ren murmured.

The sun slowly rose into the sky as Ren continued connecting wires.

Doc suddenly jumped at a touch to his arm, awareness of the metal limb flooding his mind and he gasped. Ren pulled his hands away quickly, letting go of the tool and showing Doc his empty palms.

“Hey, hey, you’re good.”

“Urgh,” Doc twitched his fingers, feeling the familiar tingle as his nerves readjusted to the sensory input. “Yeah,” he grunted, “all good. Thank you, Ren.”

“No problem my dude,” he grinned, “anytime.”

Doc rolled his shoulder, stretching out the arm and running through his calibration tests, making sure each joint moved correctly. All was in order. Ren nodded, looking happy that everything seemed to be working.

“Now we’re cooking with gas,” he joked, gathering up the tools and letting Doc put them away properly, “what say you and I grab some grub? I wanted to run through some ideas I had for the Quadruple Tree Chopper by you before we all get distracted by the potluck.”

_ Shit _ , he had forgotten about that.

“I uh,” Doc frowned, “when is it again?”

“Next week. Four days, to be exact.”

Doc groaned, burying his face in his hands.

“I forgot,” he said.

“Sounded like it,” Ren chuckled, “tell you what, dude. We can go together and you can say you helped make the milkshakes I’m bringing, but you gotta help me with this redstone, man, it’s driving me crazy.”

“Sure. Sounds like a plan,” Doc smiled, he liked the idea of fiddling with some redstone - and it would keep his mind off of Bdubs.

“Alright! Let’s get something to eat and then we’ll head over to my mesa.”

“Lead the way.”


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !!PLEASE CHECK END NOTES FOR CHAPTER-SPECIFIC WARNINGS!!
> 
> Here is the second chapter I promised!  
> The potluck has arrived~
> 
> This one is. A lot.  
> Song recs for this chapter are all by Nothing More:  
> Friendly Fire  
> Sex & Lies  
> Go To War

Doc wouldn’t say that he was nervous, exactly, but not having to think about anything except redstone for the past few days had lulled him into a false sense of security. Now, faced with what waited on the other side of the portal, he considered backing out. 

His fingers clenched around the sides of the bowl Ren was making him carry.

With a quick calming breath he stepped through the swirling purple particles. 

He blinked to adjust his eyes to the sunny day on the Mooshroom island, the diamond pile rising off to the side having grown in height since the last time he had been here. Doc could see a few shops in construction in the distance, but what drew his eye was the carpeted area bordered on one side by a long (what looked like) concrete table. Already he could see different foods set out and people milling about. 

Ren shot him a smile over his shoulder as he jumped down into the water block below, and Doc followed, careful to keep the bowl from spilling.

“X! How’s it going my dude?”

“Ren! Doc! Good to see you,” Xisuma smiled, eyes crinkling behind his visor, “excited for this year’s potluck?”

“You know it,” Ren laughed and gave him a thumbs up, “can’t wait to hear what we’ve all been up to!”

“Fantastic! Now, what you got there, Doc?”

“Ren made milkshakes,” Doc held out the bowl, “I’m just helping out.”

“Alright…” Xisuma sighed, “did you bring yourselves cups at least?”

At their sudden silence he shook his head. “Course not. Well, put it with the rest of the stuff. Everyone’s almost here, then we can get started.”

“Oops,” muttered Ren, but took the bowl from Doc and set it on the table next to his name.

Doc looked at the items spread out on the table - looked like there were some offerings of watermelon and cactus juice (Grian and Cub respectively) to go along with Ren’s bowl of milkshake, some cookies (Mumbo) next to a pumpkin pie (Iskall) and a plate of… something black and crumbly from Scar, and two nearly identical plates of sugar-coated spider eyes from Cleo and Stress (he couldn’t tell which name tag belonged to which plate). 

_Probably best to steer clear of those_ , he thought, _and was - was that a_ whole, uncut pineapple _from Jevin?_

More of the hermits began to arrive, and Doc watched Joe put down a bowl of what looked like plain lettuce, along with a large bottle of labelless wine. Beef put his golden plate of mutton next to Xisuma’s honeyed ham, and Etho followed with some slightly burnt pancakes - the masked man saw Doc looking and shot him a wink before he walked away. Zedaph, Impulse, and Tango tumbled out of the portal, their giggles bubbling out over the gathering as they set down salsa, guacamole, and a bag reading “Tango’s Special Chips” on it. Were they just potato chips in a special bag? Doc couldn’t tell.

He moved away from the table when he spotted Keralis’ bright vest emerge from the Nether portal, finding a shaded spot under one of the few mushrooms still left on the island. 

The sharp laugh that cut through the air had Doc jerking his head over to see Bdubs set down what he assumed was a pot of beetroot soup - it was the only thing the man could actually cook, afterall. 

Doc squinted, trying to get a better look at him around the others. Even from here he could see the bags under Bdubs’ eyes, and his hair was more unkempt than normal. Not post-makeout messy either just… messy. 

Bdubs turned to Iskall who was speaking to him, and their eyes briefly met. Doc quickly looked away, trying to appear casual and not like he was analyzing Bdubs’ appearance. His eyes happened to land on Grian, who was staring at him with a vexed expression.

Grian looked between Doc and Bdubs for a moment before he shifted uncomfortably and focused back on his conversation with Mumbo, laughing at something the moustached man was saying. Doc felt a hard pit settle in his stomach.

Grian hated him now, absolutely. Bdubs had turned him against him and nothing Ren had said could undo that, nothing at all. They were probably talking about him _right now_ and -

“Hello everybody,” Xisuma’s voice called out, Doc’s thoughts stuttering to a stop, “thank you for coming to this, our seventh seasonal potluck - hooray!”

Doc swallowed down the nausea from his churning guts and stepped closer to the group.

“And we have successfully avoided another all-juice potluck,” Xisuma was saying, “thank you. We still need to work on bringing cups - please bring a plate _and_ something to drink out of next time,” he held up his own mug, name engraved on the side. 

There was a chorus of laughs from everyone gathered.

“Now, TFC couldn’t make it, but he did send along his love - and a shepherd’s pie. Make sure to send him your thanks when you can.” 

Doc could see the dish now, somehow still steaming and looking fresh from the oven. The table had also gained a full ham and pineapple pizza along with just a raw salmon that was cut in half. He could make guesses as to who brought _that_ , but there were honestly too many people who it could’ve been for him to even try.

“Enjoy your time off from builds and projects - dig in!” There was a muted cheer from the group and the table was swarmed by the hungry hermits. Xisuma rolled his eyes, but Doc could tell it was fond, and the armoured man stepped off to the side with his own full plate. 

Doc picked a few of the safer offerings to dig into, giving the more questionable ones a wide berth. He saw Cub eagerly taking a bite of the blackened mess that Scar brought and winced, but the bearded man just chewed thoughtfully and swallowed, patting Scar on the back.

“Much better than last time! Good job, man.”

Scar ducked his head but there was a pleased smile on his lips. Iskall looked between the two uncertainly before he took a small bite, face immediately trying to twist into a grimace at the taste. He struggled to swallow and choked, Scar’s face flooding with concern as he fretted over Iskall, who was now bent in half and coughing into his elbow.

“I’m okay, I’m okay,” Iskall waved him off. Scar still looked concerned, but he gave him a soft smile and rubbed his shoulder. 

Iskall said something too quiet for Doc to hear, then wandered off towards Grian and Mumbo and left the two Convex to chat. Doc noticed him casually toss whatever it was he had eaten into the nearby water - understandably.

“Doc!” He looked up to see Scar approaching. “Oh my goodness I need to apologize to you!”

“Wh - me? What for?” he asked, confused.

“For your arm? Bdubs told me you lost it and me - being an idiot - I just bought it without thinking! I’m so so _so_ sorry! It just looked cool and I thought it would fit perfectly in my wizard’s village. I didn’t even know it was an arm!” Scar’s mouth pulled down in a frown, the long scars on his face tugging at the corner of his lips.

Doc blinked in shock. _Scar_ had his arm this whole time?

“Oh hey, no it’s - it’s fine,” he held his hand out, “I got it back. No harm, right?”

“Are you sure? I definitely owe you something for all the trouble I surely caused you!”

“No, don’t worry about it,” Doc reassured, “we’re good.”

“Mm, fine. _I guess_.” Scar grinned up at him. “You’ll have to come over sometime though. We haven’t hung out in a while and I’d love to show you around!”

“For sure, man. Maybe I can make something else for you to use instead of my arm?”

“Oh you don’t have to!”

“Nah, it’ll give me something fun to do. There hasn’t been a lot of time for creativity lately,” Doc shrugged, “too many problems to solve.”

“Oh yeah, I know what you mean,” Scar hummed, eyes distant, “our jungle’s had a few too many… problems lately.”

Doc followed his gaze to the three hermits he was staring at with a soft, sad smile. Mumbo, Iskall, and Grian were inspecting the potluck table - the Architechs apparently in a heated debate over some of the food. Scar’s smile grew as Grian poked at Iskall’s stomach, giggling as he batted his hand away. 

“I see,” Doc said, “good luck, then.”

Scar shook his head with a sigh, but the smile never dropped from his face.

“They don’t need me worming my way in when they haven’t even figured it out themselves. Don’t worry about it, Doc. Have a good rest of the potluck!”

His mouth opened to say something, but Scar was already walking away and waving to Ren. Doc let him go.

He stood there, listening to the hum of conversation around him - the murmur of close conversation and peals of delighted laughter as friends reunited. 

Doc felt… lonely.

He picked at his food, appetite vanishing into dust. He had chatted enough right? He could probably leave now and no one would miss him. Yeah, that sounded like a plan. 

He scraped his leftovers into the composter Xisuma had set up, watching with faint amusement as Zedaph and Impulse took turns pouring juice into Tango’s open mouth as he laid on the ground. They were making a mess, but appeared to be having a great time. Tango sputtered as he swallowed, shouting that soup wasn’t juice, while the other two argued that since it was a liquid it should count. Doc could see Grian run up and join the debate, high-fiving Zed as he did so.

Well, that was as good a distraction as any. 

Doc shuffled to the back of the group, glancing around to make sure no one was paying him attention, and then turned to sneak behind the diamond pile and away. However, he promptly ran straight into the person that had been behind him. He blinked, and found himself looking into the dark brown eyes of Bdubs, and he felt the anxious nausea spike.

“Watch it,” he growled.

“ _Me_ !? You’re one to talk, you _ass_ \- you’re the one who ran into me!”

“Bdubs, not now.” Doc tried to step past him, but he blocked the way.

“Here I was coming to talk to you! But nooo. Doc says ‘not now’ - what a surprise!” Bdubs barked a sarcastic laugh. “You’ve never been one to use your words.”

“Look who’s talking! You’ve never wanted to talk about _anything_ before. Besides -” Doc pointed at the bruises blossoming along the other’s neck, “I’d rather not talk to you after you’ve been - what? Having a quickie at the community potluck?”

He could feel eyes starting to turn to them, but he shrugged it off as he felt anger _burn_ in his chest, the flames rushing through him with a ferocity that almost took him by surprise. His hands shook as they clenched into fists.

“Is there anyone here you _haven’t_ fucked?” he challenged, “is that what you did when you left? Did you spend two years being a _cheap whore_ -”

Doc was shoved back roughly, the hands smacking against his chest catching him off-guard enough that he stumbled back a couple steps. He looked up and he could see the shocked hurt on Bdubs’ face morph into a snarl, his eyes turning cold and hard.

“I-I - _how dare you_ ! _You’re_ going to judge _me_ , Mr. Perfect!? HA!” Bdubs strode forward and shoved him again, “Mr. Cold as Ice? You barely even _have_ emotions, don’t you!?”

He moved to push him again, and Doc caught his wrists. Bdubs railed against the hold, but Doc didn’t budge, tightening his grip.

“Yeah!?” Bdubs shouted. “You don’t! And to think I thought you loved me - what a joke! LET. GO!”

Doc’s heart pounded in his ears, in his head, the only sound besides Bdubs’ furious voice the rushing of his blood. Bdubs twisted in his grasp and he released him with a growl, his jaw clenched so hard his teeth almost hurt. Doc’s mind was struggling to find words amongst the chaos of his mind, unable to refute Bdubs’ words in the moment. 

There was a gasp from the gathered hermits as Doc felt pain bloom across his face.

His hand rose to his nose and when he pulled it back his fingers were stained the muddied crimson of his blood. 

Bdubs stood before him, fist still raised and ready.

“Fuck you.” Bdubs bit out. “Fuck you, and fuck our relationship!”

Doc took a step forward.

“Yeah, come on!” Bdubs was nearly shrieking. “ _Hit_ me! I know you want to - you’ve always wanted to! You _freak_!”

Voices were raised in alarm around them, but Doc didn’t hear them. Not even Keralis’ desperate shout of ‘Shishwamy!’ reached his ears. He couldn’t think - couldn’t talk - all he could hear were Bdubs’ words.

“I hate you! I hate you! I wish I’d never met you! You’re a _monster_ \- why don’t you act like one AND _HIT ME_!”

Doc saw _red_.

There was a thud as his knuckles connected with Bdubs’ cheek, his head jerking to the side at the impact. 

Time stood still. 

He could see the white hot flame of _rage_ (and maybe something more) spark in Bdubs’ eyes as he turned his head back to Doc. 

Bdubs sucked in a breath, and then he was lunging forward - and Doc was racing to meet him. 

They met in the middle. A wild fist caught him in the chin, his teeth clicking together painfully. He was growling deep in his chest, a primal, raw sound that ripped out of his throat as he grabbed for Bdubs. Doc’s fingers brushed sleeves and he clawed at them, twisting the fabric into his hands with a small tearing sound. Bdubs flailed, pushing his hands into Doc’s face to try to get him to release him, throwing his smaller body forward to unbalance the cyborg.

Doc’s mind was ablaze, logic pushed down by base instinct as he fought. Bdubs kept trying to push him over, to topple him onto the ground so he could have the upper hand, but Doc refused to let him, leaning forward more and more until their heads were right next to each other.

Brown eyes met his mismatched ones.

 _Monster_ , his mind repeated back to him.

He opened his mouth, baring his shark-like teeth. If Bdubs wanted a monster so bad, he would give him one -

With a voice like a thunderclap, a body appeared between them and shoved them apart with incredible strength. 

“ ** _STOP._ **”

Doc went sprawling, his legs unable to hold himself up. He heard Bdubs curse as he too landed on his ass.

Xisuma stood where they had been, particles from teleporting still floating around him. His eyes glowed with his power, making Doc shrink back.

 _Oh no_ , he thought. _W_ _hat have I done?_

“ _That_ is quite enough of that.” Xisuma said, glaring at the two of them. “This is no place to be fighting like a pair of animals! Doc, Bdubs - what the hell are you _doing_?”

Doc didn’t know. He just. He… 

He looked at Bdubs around Xisuma’s legs - at the bruise that was starting to colour his face and the rips now in his clothes - and felt shame flood him. 

What was he doing? This was terrible! Oh god. Oh no. He had to leave, he had to get out of here right now. 

Xisuma looked between the two and sighed, shoulders dropping from their angry, tense position. He rubbed at the back of his helmet, shaking his head.

“Go home, you two. I’ll be talking with you both tomorrow.”

Doc was trying not to panic, his chest hitching with short breaths. He watched as Keralis helped Bdubs out, the other man keeping his face turned away and down. 

The hands on his arm startled him, and he jerked out of the touch as he looked up at the owner. Ren stared down at him with wide, concerned eyes, his ears pressed flat against his skull. 

“Ren,” he whispered, horrified, “what have I done?”

“C’mon bud,” he just said, “let’s get you out of here.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CHAPTER WARNINGS:  
> slut-shaming, name calling, insults, physical fight between people in a relationship, violence, mild blood
> 
> im sorry....  
> If you'd like some insight into how Bdubs is doing before next chapter please listen to Kill My Memory - Citizen Soldier


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dfghksjg I'm so sorry this took an extra week to get done!! D8  
> I got really burnt out last weekend and had to take a break from writing and talking to people (if I haven't gotten to your comment yet I'm sorry my brain is bad)
> 
> But now~ onto the chapter >83c

There was a small patch of blood on his knuckles.

He wanted to wipe it off, but his hands were shaking too badly.

His face _should_ be sore, he was pretty sure, but a numbness had spread throughout his limbs, keeping him from feeling any of his physical aches. The emotional pain, however, was like a knife stabbing into his guts and twisting, rolling waves of regret washing through him. 

Bdubs could tell he was moving, someone - probably Keralis - helping him along. He didn’t care where they were going as long as he could be alone. 

_The look on Doc’s face -_

No. He didn’t want to think about that. 

But his thoughts kept circling back to that moment, right after his fist had struck and Doc’s nose began to bleed. That moment. When he saw the raw, open _hurt_ in his expression. 

And he had told him to go fuck himself and their relationship. 

It had been like he had reached inside Doc’s chest and grabbed his still-beating heart - and then tore it to shreds. 

Bdubs had seen the way Doc’s eyes had gone cold and the emotion in them shattered like ice. He had thought Doc hated him before (and how wrong he had been) - surely now he had destroyed every last grain of affection the man once held for him. 

_That’s good, isn’t it?_ He thought to himself. _Now I can’t hurt him anymore_.

But that was wrong too, wasn’t it? 

When had Bdubs ever been right?

Doc was infuriating, and stubborn, and a terrible know-it-all. He hid behind his stony expression and hard words, impossible to read and strong enough to finish fights with his fists. He was all rough edges and he made Bdubs’ blood _boil_.

But he was also soft, unexpectedly kind, and felt deeply. Bdubs should have known that after their time together. Doc almost always cooked, a small, content smile on his face as he put their plates down - and he always stood by Bdubs’ side in support and ready to defend him when needed.

And he had never once raised a hand to him. Never hit him. Doc was rough but sweet and had only ever used his strength where Bdubs wanted it - namely in bed. It scratched the itch in him - the one that wanted to scratch and bite and hurt until he was pinned to the bed and just _taken_. Doc was always good for that. 

Unfortunately, Bdubs needed more. That’s why he sought out the others and spent nights in their beds, with the bonus of it riling Doc up. They had never directly talked about it, but he had assumed it was fine. That was, until _that_ night.

Bdubs remembered the night he left. What awful things they said to each other.

It hadn’t been as bad as today - the wounds having clearly festered during their time apart - but it was nasty and emotional.

So Bdubs had left. 

He hadn’t intended to get lost like he did - and when he returned everyone had moved on without him. Which was fine - he was fine with that. He didn’t need them. But he and Doc had unfinished business, so he _needed_ to find them - that was the reason he told himself, anyway.

Dammit. This really was all his fault.

He was startled out of his thoughts when a pair of hands landed on his shoulders and pushed him down to sit on a shulker. 

“Come on, Bubbles, let me see that hand,” Keralis said.

“Huh?”

Fingers grasped his and brushed against his knuckles, the touch causing Bdubs to hiss in pain as he suddenly became aware of how sore they were. He let Keralis gently take his hand and begin wrapping it with a bandage. 

“Why not just give me a healing potion?” he asked. 

“Because you’re going to heal this the normal way. I think you want to think about your hand and your face for a little bit, maybe.” His touch was still soft and caring, but Keralis’ voice had a sharpness to it. 

He was right. 

“Thank you,” Bdubs said quietly, eyes down turned. “I don’t deserve this. This is all my fault.”

Keralis finished wrapping his hand and sighed, letting Bdubs pull back. 

“It is definitely mostly your fault, yes. Bubbles, why would you say such things?”

Bdubs put his head in his hands, mindful of the sore side of his face.

“I don’t know,” he admitted, “I just - I. I just _did_. Gah - I need to leave. I have to go, I should never have come back!”

“No,” Keralis stood, blocking him from the door of his barrack-house, “no. Shishwamy is coming by tomorrow and then you and Doc are going to have a nice long conversation about yourselves and the words you said to each other.”

He gripped at his hair, fingers tightening in the strands and pulling. 

“You’re right. You’re so right. But how do I - where do I even begin?”

Keralis gave him a small, sad smile. 

“Start with an apology. That’s what I am going to do. I need to say sorry for my involvement in this.”

Bdubs closed his eyes and nodded. His thoughts were going a million miles an hour, but he could do this. He just had to hold on until tomorrow, and then he could say his piece and _leave_. He wouldn’t be sticking around to hurt Doc again. 

Keralis tugged at his sleeve, drawing his gaze up. 

“Come on. We will stay busy until then - you can hold some things for me while I trade with my villagers.”

Bdubs was brought to his feet and the two headed out. 

\- - -

He awoke the next morning with a splitting headache and a swollen cheek, gratefully drinking the cold water Keralis gave him when he saw Bdubs stumble into his tiny kitchen area. 

He had barely slept, laying alone on the bed Keralis had set up for him and staring at the ceiling, his thoughts swirling around and around. Bdubs’ exhaustion eventually caught up to him and he closed his eyes only to blink them open what felt like minutes later. He assumed it had been at least an hour, but he couldn’t tell. 

Bdubs was hungry but he couldn’t eat - both because of the pain and the nervousness gnawing at his stomach - so he just sat there, sipping his water and waiting for Xisuma to appear.

Thankfully, he didn’t have to wait long. 

There was a knock at the door and Bdubs jerked to attention, standing and opening the door. He met the dark eyes beneath the visor and swallowed.

“Alright, morning you two,” Xisuma said, his normally cheery voice clipped and serious, “let’s go, Bdubs. Doc’s waiting.”

“Hold on Shishwamy! I’m coming too,” Keralis piped up, gathering up a few things into his pockets.

“Oh - alright, but why?”

“I have my own apologies to make - and Bubbles might need some support after, yes?”

“Keralis it’s fine,” Bdubs muttered.

“Nonsense, Bubbles. I’m ready now - lead on, Shishwamy!”

The three of them took off into the sky and headed northeast, approaching the desert he knew the ZIT boys were settled near. Bdubs could see a short concrete building alone among the dunes, and as Xisuma started to descend, he figured this was their destination. 

He eyed the iron door as his feet brushed the sand. Doc was behind that door. 

Bdubs wasn’t sure if he could do this. 

Xisuma stepped forward and opened the door with a flick of the lever, giving Bdubs a nod before he disappeared inside. Keralis quickly propped down a shulker box and settled atop it, shooting him a thumbs up and waving him inside. He took a deep breath, held it, and when he released it he walked into the building.

It was a simple one-room build, with a table and two chairs in the centre, a third chair sat off to the side. Doc sat on the opposite side of the table with his hands braced against the solid wood top.

Bdubs took him in, gaze traveling over the dark green and black bruising that painted the area around his nose, the bags under his organic eye, and the mussed state of his hair - like fingers had been running through it for hours.

Doc looked as terrified as Bdubs _felt_.

They both startled as a chair scraped against the ground, looking over at Xisuma who had straightened the third one and sat in it, nodding with his head to indicate that Bdubs should do the same. He sat down opposite Doc, trying to keep his eyes on the tabletop, but they kept flickering up to look at the other man. 

“So,” Xisuma began, “I am here to mediate a… _discussion_ between the two of you. After the events of yesterday I, along with several other hermits, feel that you can no longer be trusted to sort this out amongst yourselves without supervision. I will remain a neutral party and will only intervene if things threaten to turn physical. Again.”

Bdubs ducked his head at that, feeling the roiling anxiety in him sour with shame.

“I will also assist with whatever you both need afterwards, should you ask it. Now,” the helmeted man cleared his throat, leaning back in his chair, “it’s your turn.”

Silence hung heavy in the air for a while, Bdubs’ heavy breathing the only sound in his ears. He kept his eyes on the table, psyching himself up. Finally, he sucked in a breath and opened his mouth and -

“ _I’m sorry._ ” Doc and Bdubs said at the same time, their eyes meeting. 

“W-what?” Bdubs stammered, confused.

“I’m sorry,” Doc repeated. He closed his eyes and bowed his head, shoulders squared and tense. “I am so sorry for my actions yesterday, Bdubs. I should have _never_ hit you,” his voice hitched, “my actions are inexcusable.”

“Seriously, what?” he almost laughed, “I need to apologize to _you_ . That - that was entirely my fault and you have every right to be pissed at me.” Bdubs paused, picking at a loose thread on his pants - he could do this. “What I said… I shouldn’t have said any of that. Calling you a -” he gulped - “a _monster_? That was terrible of me and I’m sorry.”

He looked up at the man across from him, his downturned face impossible to read.

“Hell,” Bdubs said, “it’s okay. I really made you angry, and I know I destroyed any feelings you had for me -”

“Stop.” Doc leaned back and raised his head. “You don’t know anything about what I’m feeling, Bdubs.”

He considered that for a moment and then sighed with a nod.

“You’re right.”

“What?”

“I said: you’re right. I keep assuming your feelings - and look at where that’s gotten me.” He could see Xisuma looking at him out of the corner of his eye. “I _fucked_ up, man. I said cruel things to you and forced you to hit me.” Bdubs clutched at the table, staring at Doc; the cyborg stared back at him, jaw set. 

His heart pounded a hard rhythm in his chest, each beat a part of the song that was his shame. Every pulse in his ears another strike against him. Bdubs could feel the sour coil of regret in his throat, but the seconds Doc spent looking at him in silence had the all-too familiar frustration and anger kicking up.

“Even before!” Bdubs practically shouted. “I’ve been doing and saying horrible things to you from the beginning! You should hate me! You - you should want to _kill_ me for all the things I’ve done!”

“But I don’t.” Doc answered, drawing him up short. 

His chest hitched, caught around the tangle of emotions those three words trapped in his throat, threatening to choke him. His face twisted, anger being replaced with confusion and trembling lips.

“Why!?” Bdubs nearly sobbed the word, searching his face for answers. Doc opened his mouth then closed it with a snap, blowing a breath out through his nose and scrunching his eye closed.

“Because I love you.” He said. “Because damn it all - I can’t stop.”

Bdubs thought his heart had stopped. There was a faint ringing in his ears and he felt light-headed, unable to breath. Everyone was wrong, his thoughts cried, falling in love didn’t make your heart skip a beat - it was hearing that you were _still_ loved despite your actions that really did it.

“Why,” he whispered pleadingly, “after everything - why?”

“I don’t know,” came the answer, Doc’s eyes still closed, “I’m angry and sad but I can’t stop. It’s like you stole a piece of my heart, Bdubs. You stole it and lost it but it cannot be returned - and I can’t stop how I feel.”

He wanted to _cry_ \- and he nearly did - but part of what Doc said stopped him.

“What do you mean - lost?”

“Well,” Doc glanced up at him, a wry smile on his lips, “I’m not sure when it happened but your love for me is gone. I mean,” he laughed humorlessly, “unless I’ve been more of a fool than usual. Did you ever even love me? Or did I misunderstand everything?”

“Wh - you -” Bdubs was _floored_. Did Doc really think so little of him? “And you told me to stop assuming! What the hell!?”

Doc stiffened, eyebrows dropping into a glare. Xisuma sat forward, clearly ready to intervene, but Bdubs continued.

“How dare you! Of _course_ I loved you, you idiot! I still love you too!”

“Wh - then why!?” Doc sputtered. “Why do you do the things you do?”

“I DON’T KNOW!”

Xisuma stood up with a harsh scraping sound from his chair, stopped only by Doc holding up a hand. Bdubs barely noticed before he slumped in his chair, burying his face in his arms on the table.

“Xisuma,” he heard Doc murmur, “can you give us a minute. Please.”

There wasn’t a response but the sound of the door opening and closing echoed in the small room before a chair was set beside him and Bdubs felt the gentle touch of a metal hand on his back. It stroked up and down slowly, comfortingly, and he sighed into his elbows.

“ ‘m not crying,” Bdubs muttered.

“Mmhmm.”

“I’m sorry,” he said as he peeked over his arms, “I shouldn’t have yelled.”

“It’s us - yelling is part of our relationship.” Doc chuckled.

“It shouldn’t be.” Bdubs sat up. His face was dry - thankfully - but he knew his eyes were red-rimmed. “You don’t deserve all the shit I’ve done, Doc. I don’t know how you put up with me for as long as you did.”

“I always thought it balanced out, if I’m being honest. And… I figured you had your reasons and if I loved you that would have to be enough.” Bdubs winced. “No?”

“I don’t know why I do some of the things I do - honestly. I mean, I have ideas, but sometimes I just. Do things. Say things…” He swallowed, mouth dry. Doc’s calm expression making fear stir in his stomach. “Do you remember our fight? The big one?”

Doc nodded. “Of course.”

“Do you remember what it was about?”

“Not… really?” His eyes flicked up and away, thinking. “Something about Etho, right?”

Bdubs gritted his teeth. Dammit all - he didn’t want to talk about this. Why couldn’t Doc just _know_ what he was talking about?

“I slept with him.” He said. “And you - you were _so mad_. You didn’t say the word exactly, but you called me a - a slut and that I had broken your trust and -” he paused, looking at Doc. He had paled, expression vaguely sick.

“I remember.” Doc closed his eyes. “ _Shit_. I shouldn’t have said that - I’m so sorry. You’re allowed to sleep with whoever you want,” Bdubs saw his lips twitch briefly into a frown, “I’m too controlling. You’re your own person -”

“No! Doc, I’m saying you were _right_.”

“... What?”

“I -” there was the guilt again. Always there, just waiting under the surface for him to fuck up again. “When I told you - you were so hurt. You’re normally really good at not showing your emotions, but this time. I could see it all over your face. I fucked _your friends_ and acted like it was no big deal. You told me you couldn’t trust me anymore, couldn’t trust them either. And I yelled back because you were _right_. I had betrayed you, but I didn’t want to own up to it.”

Bdubs tried to meet Doc’s eyes but the other man refused to look at him. His face kept trying to form expressions, but he was obviously working hard to keep it neutral. The guilt clawed at Bdubs’ ribs, desperate to be let out.

“I broke your trust,” he breathed, “and I don’t think you ever got it back.”

“No I - I trust my friends! The hermits are my family -”

“And I fucked them without you knowing about it until after.”

“I - you’re allowed to sleep with people. I know you need more than me,” Doc defended, hands raised.

“But I never even asked you!” Bdubs said. Guilt was pushing at his lungs, his voice, begging him to tell Doc. “You think your friends betrayed you and you need to know they didn’t! It was my fault!”

“Bdubs, no. I - that’s not what I think,” Doc’s voice trembled, giving away his lie, “yes, it hurt, but I can handle it.”

“Doc,” Bdubs’ stomach felt like he had eaten enough obsidian to make a portal, “everyone I slept with thought you were okay with it.”

There it was. His big lie.

“What do you mean?” Doc asked, eyes wide.

“No one knew we fought about it. I liked how it made you jealous and you always fucked me so good after - I never thought it would affect your relationship with anyone else. Not until yesterday.” At Doc’s confused look he added, “you were muttering ‘I need to leave, I need to leave’ when you ran into me.”

Doc blinked at him, shock written across his features. Huh, seems he didn’t know that.

“I _know_ you. You used to tell me you were worried everyone was afraid of you or didn’t like you because of what you were.” _And he had even used_ that _against him yesterday. What a complete bastard he was_. “I always told people ‘Doc knows. It’s fine.’ Two separate facts that no one questioned.”

Doc abruptly stood, spinning away from him and stalking to the far end of the room, then paced back and repeated for a minute, head down.

“ _I’m sorry_.” Bdubs choked out. “I messed everything up, so often. I shouldn’t have come back. All I do is hurt you.”

Doc stopped, looking down at Bdubs with tears in his eyes.

“No one knew?” he asked in a quiet voice.

Bdubs shook his head. “No one. I’m so sorry - it was all me.”

He grimaced as Doc buried his face in his hands and his shoulders shook. He ached to comfort the other man, to wrap his arms around him and hold him as he cried, but he had lost that right a long time ago. For now, all he could do was watch as Doc came to terms with the truth that Bdubs had just given him. 

“Why?” Doc finally asked, wiping the dampness from his cheeks. “Why couldn’t we just _talk_ to each other.”

“I. I didn’t think you’d want to be with me if I asked permission. Even if you didn’t leave me, maybe you’d never be rough with me again - I don’t know,” Bdubs admitted, “I told you - sometimes I just do or say things and I can’t - I can’t take them back now. I just didn’t want to lose what we had,” at Doc’s scoff he smiled sadly, “yeah. Look where that got me.”

 _Alone for years - just what you were afraid of._ He thought. _Hurting the man I love - Loved? Love._

“No one ever said I was smart,” he muttered. Doc sighed and pulled his chair back beside him and sat. He reached out with a soft questioning look and Bdubs gratefully took a hold of his hand. “I’m so sorry.”

“Me too,” Doc sighed, thumb rubbing small circles on his bandaged knuckles, “I shouldn’t have said the cruel things I said, and I have always been too harsh and rough with you outside of sex - don’t give me that look, I know you hate it when I grab you outside the bedroom.”

Bdubs closed his mouth with a snap - he was right but he always felt he deserved it. 

“I guess we both made some pretty awful mistakes, huh?”

“Damn right.”

They shared a quiet, familiar laugh together, before Doc got his attention.

“We… should probably stop _this_. Whatever this relationship was these last couple of weeks.”

Bdubs nodded, trying to hide how badly his body wanted to shake. He didn’t want to be alone, but Doc was right. Besides, he had people he could stay with, sleep with - he didn’t have to spend his nights lonely. 

But his guilty heart whispered that he had done too much wrong that no one would ever want him again. He swallowed, shoving the thoughts aside. It would be okay - he could do this. 

It would be better for them both if they ended things.

“We should speak to Xisuma,” Doc said with a huff, using his free hand to wipe at his face tiredly, “make it official.”

“What?” 

It would be okay, whatever they did. Bdubs knew that, but he was still afraid. His fingers tightened around Doc’s. His heart was back to trying to choke him with each beat as he fought to breathe through the mild panic coursing through him.

“We need to get divorced. Officially.”

 _Ah_.

He nodded, closing his eyes against the sting of tears - he wouldn’t let them fall. Doc was right, of course. Neither of them had managed to move on during their two years apart and it was partially thanks to their continued union (the other part being their refusal to talk to each other but, well, they had taken care of that now too).

Bdubs drew in a deep steadying breath and, when he was ready, opened his eyes to meet Doc’s gaze.

“You’re right. Let’s get divorced.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY IT'S BEEN A WHILE WHOOPS
> 
> To be completely honest this chapter was written months ago but I wanted to give you ch10 and ch11 all at once.  
> BUT my depression and everything is still kicking my ass and is making writing hard, so I wanted to give y'all chapter 10 now so you know I haven't forgotten, I'm just struggling rn and need some time 8)
> 
> I love y'all <3

They sat together in silence for a while.

It was nice, Bdubs thought, being able to just spend time with each other. It had been far too long. All they needed was some coffee and it would be just like old lazy mornings at home.

Eventually, Doc straightened with a sigh and pulled his hand from his. Bdubs’ fingers twitched against air before he dropped his hand into his lap. 

“We should talk to Xisuma.”

He looked up quickly in surprise.

“Wh - you mean now?” he asked.

“Well, he would have to be the one to do it.” Doc moved to stand up and Bdubs grabbed for his arm, stopping him. 

“Can we - do you think we could wait a few days?” he fought to keep the sudden panic from his voice. “I mean, Xisuma probably needs time to prepare and - and witnesses! We’ll need those!” He noticed the tight hold he had on Doc and abruptly released him. “Sorry, sorry. Just...”

“Will three days be enough?”

Meeting Doc’s gaze, Bdubs couldn’t tell what he was thinking, the cyborg’s face carefully blank.

He nodded slowly. “Y-yeah, three days should be fine.”

“I’ll go tell Xisuma.” Doc stood carefully, as if waiting for Bdubs to grab for him again. He didn’t, and Doc made his way to the door and opened it, motioning for Xisuma to come in.

“Well, boys?” the admin asked.

“In three days we would like you to divorce us,” Doc said.

Xisuma stiffened in surprise, turning to look at Bdubs questioningly. He nodded, watching a strange kind of relief fill the eyes behind the visor. 

“Alright. Seems like you two got things settled? Good. I do have a suggestion, if you’d like to hear.”

They shared a quick look with each other before Bdubs shrugged. “Go ahead.”

“Move out of that house. Start fresh in a place _not_ filled with memories of your arguments.”

Bdubs opened his mouth to protest, but closed it with a snap. He was right, of course he was - that was the best option for them. 

_But I don’t want to_ , he thought. He shook his head to clear it - no, they needed to do this, just like they needed to get divorced.

“You’re right,” he sighed, “we should do that.”

He saw Doc’s hand twitch up out of the corner of his eye before it dropped back to his side.

“Right.” Doc said. “Yes.”

The rest of the meeting passed by in a blur. 

They ironed out the details for their divorce and Keralis even popped in at one point and agreed to act as witness for Bdubs - and his apology to Doc was short and sweet, the other man forgiving Keralis easily with a wave of his hand. 

With everything settled, Doc and Bdubs said farewell to the others and flew towards the mansion, not quite together, but not apart either.

\- - -

It was odd, cleaning up your life. Sure, Bdubs hadn’t lived in the divided mansion for too long, but it had begun to feel like a home, much more than his castle or any of the temporary camps he set up when he was lost anyway. And now, methodically packing items into shulkers, he was struck by a sense of homesickness he had thought he was over years ago. 

He was going to miss this place. 

_Or are you just going to miss being so near to him?_ His treacherous thoughts supplied. 

Maybe it was both, he conceded. He had missed having a place to return to - just like he had missed Doc. 

It was easier to think now, two days after their conversation, with their divorce looming on the horizon. Bdubs had caught glimpses of the other man moving around his side similarly, though Doc had much less in the way of interior decorations to deal with. Redstone though, he had plenty of. 

More than once, Bdubs had caught himself pausing in his packing to watch Doc sweep up the red dust with low curses, wiping down some of the places it had stained. His own face often held a small, amused smile at the sight.

Currently, he was doing just that - his arms resting on a shulker full of dirt and flowers while he stared across at his soon-to-be ex-husband. 

Doc had been working on moving his stuff to a new base, something he was constructing out on the ocean, so his side of the mansion was standing bare but for the man himself. Bdubs could still hear some villagers making a racket beneath the ground, so he figured they would be moved later or set free if Doc had no more use for them (he couldn't blame him - villagers were the _worst_ ).

He watched as Doc finished inspecting his clean-up job and stood, shaking out each leg and then putting his hands on his back and stretching with a satisfied groan that was audible even from Bdubs’ place on the third floor. He admired the pull of those muscles under the tattered lab coat and the strong line of abs when Doc turned, giving Bdubs a nice view of his profile. 

He remembered the feel of that rough skin under his fingers. The way the scars bumped and dipped - even the new ones - and the sheen of sweat from hot nights spent under covers.

The brief sting of shoving him away. And how Doc’s face had felt against his knuckles…

Bdubs startled when he heard a sharp knock on his door, Doc’s form now missing from his view. He quickly scrambled down the stairs and opened the door to find him standing nervously on the porch, the small twitches of his thumbs giving it away. 

“Hey,” Doc said.

“Hi. You know, there’s nothing exactly keeping you out there right now,” he looked pointedly to the right where the wall of the house ended in thin air, “you could’ve come in.”

“Didn’t want to be rude,” he shrugged, “can I come in now?”

Bdubs rolled his eyes but stepped back, allowing him entry. Doc looked around at the messy sprawl of open chests with an amused quirk of his lips.

“Still packing up?”

“Trying to organize everything before I move it - some of us have furniture to dismantle, you know!” Bdubs tried not to wince at the sharpness of his tone. “Sorry,” he muttered, “not trying to be defensive.”

“It’s okay.”

“So... what brings you here, neighbour?”

“I-uh was cleaning up outside and a tree dropped this on me,” Doc held up a shiny red apple, “thought we could share it?” He offered it to Bdubs. “It seemed appropriate - symbolic, even - for our last night.”

His hand didn’t shake like Bdubs’ would have, the metal too rigid and the man too disciplined for that, but he could see the twitch of muscles in Doc’s other arm as that fist clenched. 

Bdubs reached out slowly to take the fruit, fingertips brushing over the cool metal. He looked down at it, rolling it in his hands and weighing his options. This was… unexpected of Doc. 

“What do you want?” he finally asked.

He glanced up and met Doc’s gaze, his expression slightly surprised. The cyborg huffed and nodded, lips twitching up in a wry smile.

“Should have known you’d figure me out so fast - you’ve always been good at reading me.” 

Bdubs waited, tapping gently on the apple as Doc seemed to gather his thoughts. He took in the other man’s appearance, which seemed to be much improved since they last talked a few days ago. 

There were no longer heavy bags beneath his organic eye and the bruising had faded enough that the darker green patches blended in with his natural colouring. He looked _good_ . More than good, if Bdubs’ dick had anything to say about it, but he refused to let his attraction to Doc heat his blood. He needed to keep a clear head and to _stop thinking about sex for once in his life!_

“This is hard to ask - to say - but let me finish, please.” Doc wouldn’t look him in the eye. “I have… missed you. A lot. The past two years without you has been harder than I can say, and our time together since has been messy.”

Bdubs winced guiltily. The broken emotion on Doc’s face at the potluck would haunt him for a long while.

“I’m happy we talked, and it’s helped me to reach out to others and be more open. Ren says I still have a lot to work on, but it’s only been a couple days,” he shrugged, “I’ve got time to get better.”

“He’s a good friend,” Bdubs said with an encouraging smile.

“Yeah. So, I have been thinking. About you, about us, about the past and what we’re doing in the future.” Doc drew in a steadying breath and Bdubs watched him carefully. “Bdubs, I don’t want my last memory of touching you be my fist on your face.”

He thought his heart just about stopped right there. _What_?

“Wh -” he stuttered, swallowing, “what? What do you mean?”

Finally Doc raised his head to look him in the eye, the air thick with sudden tension. Neither of them had moved, but the space felt too-small, not big enough for the history between them. 

“I’m asking.” Doc licked his lips, the movement drawing Bdubs’ gaze. His grip on the apple digging divots into the flesh. “You can say no, but I thought maybe - maybe you’d like to have _one_ last night together? And… I’ve missed you,” he confessed. “I want to.”

Bdubs shook himself from his stupor and quickly pinched his arm, hard. When he didn’t suddenly sit up in bed he knew that it wasn’t a dream. 

_Doc wanted? But - but he. He had_ missed _him_. 

Doc was wrong: Bdubs couldn’t always read him. Sometimes he was just as clueless as when they first met.

But this. Bdubs knew this. The communication was new, but the stifling aura of anticipation and the hopeful, wanting look in Doc’s eyes wasn’t.

Slowly, he raised his hand with the bruised and slightly crushed apple and brought it to his lips. Without looking away from Doc, he took a large bite, juice running down his chin as he chewed, and swallowed.

“ _Yes_.”

It was like a magnetic pull, how they drifted together - not sudden or rushed, but steady and inevitable. 

Bdubs’ hands slid up Doc’s chest to cup his face, smoothing his thumbs over the faint marks of their fight. Doc was still beneath his touch until he leaned up and brushed his lips to his cheek in apology, then his hands were covered by flesh and metal. Doc pressed their bodies closer, sighing in Bdubs’ ear before he was nudging their lips together. 

It wasn’t chaste by any means, but it was the most gentle they had kissed in years. There was no desperate biting or need to win - their lips slid together almost lazily. When Doc’s tongue slipped in and began to trace along his molars, Bdubs melted against him with a happy groan. 

He felt Doc’s hands leave his only to be scooped up in his arms moments later, breaking the kiss to squeak in surprise at the bridal carry. He looked up at Doc questioningly and got a smirk in return before their mouths were being pressed together once more. 

The arms behind his back and beneath his knees were solid and strong, and Bdubs felt safe within them. He was also extremely turned on by the show of power, his own hands scrambling for purchase on Doc’s ratty lab coat as he whined into his mouth. Doc knew just what his arms did to him. 

Bdubs had to tear his mouth away, sucking in a shaky breath as Doc watched him with a quiet chuckle.

“Good?”

_I’m going to miss your kisses_ , he thought with an ache.

“You’ve got a talented mouth,” he replied. “You know it does things to me.”

“Heh. Bedroom?”

“Upstairs. I was gonna pack the bed up tomorrow - lucky us.” Bdubs shifted in Doc’s hold, biting his lip as the movement put pressure on his cock. Doc took in his expression hungrily, heading for the stairs without another word. 

Bdubs tucked his head against Doc’s throat and began to nip and suck at the skin as they ascended, teasing it between his teeth. Doc’s steps wavered a few times, but he pressed on, his pace noticeably quicker now. 

The bed was soft beneath him when Doc set him down, sitting to the side but keeping Bdubs’ legs in his lap as he did so. They pulled back and locked eyes with each other for a moment before their lips were meeting in a fevered kiss. Doc hummed into his mouth, fingers slipping beneath his shirt as they rested on his hip. 

Bdubs broke the kiss to lean back and tear his shirt off, throwing it behind him without a care where it landed. He grabbed the collar of Doc’s lab coat and began pushing it off his shoulders, the other man getting the hint and shrugging it off the rest of the way. Down to just their pants, Bdubs took a moment to appreciate the body of the man before him, palms resting on Doc’s chest. 

His fingertips traced the scarred edge where flesh met metal - he knew how far it extended beneath the skin, both to keep Doc alive and to help support the weight of the limb. How much of an asshole was he, Bdubs thought to himself, that he had said and done awful things to this man before him. 

Some of his thoughts must have shown on his face because Doc tilted his face up and took his lips in a gentle, comforting kiss. Bdubs leaned into it, slipping his arms over Doc’s shoulders and opening his mouth with a sigh, flicking his tongue against Doc’s. 

He felt hands slide down and around to his back, continuing lower and lower until Doc’s hands were on his butt. Bdubs smiled into the kiss, shifting his hips so he could get a better grip, and was rewarded with a rough squeeze. He moaned, trying to change their position but his legs were trapped on Doc’s. He whined, squirming, until Doc pulled back with a grin.

“What’s wrong?”

“Let me change positions,” he complained, “and take off my pants.” _You ass_ , was on the tip of his tongue, but he bit down on the insult and instead used his nails to scratch along Doc’s back - the other man sighing at the sensation and arching his back into it.

Doc gripped his ass tightly once more before he loosened his grasp and let Bdubs slip backwards and out of his hold. 

Bdubs made quick work of his pants, shoving them down and off along with his underwear, and then he was turning back to Doc. Doc, who was staring at him with a soft, almost _sad_ look in his eyes, mouth open as if he was going to say something. The look cleared and his mouth closed with a snap, lips turning up into a sultry smile as he kicked off his own pants.

“You’re not wearing underwear again,” Bdubs pointed out, choosing to ignore whatever that was.

“Lucky you.” Doc joked, reaching for him.

Bdubs let himself be drawn in, leaning into the touch with a hum. 

He was tugged forward until he was kneeling on the bed, his knees bracketing Doc’s, the cyborg’s hands running over his back, his hips, his thighs, thumbs digging into soft skin and holding him up as a hot tongue lapped at a nipple. Bdubs’ head fell back and he swayed forward into it with a groan, hands coming up to grab at Doc’s hair and hold him close. 

Doc huffed out a laugh and nipped at his chest, earning a cry as Bdubs’ body jerked in surprise and he shoved Doc backwards, but was pulled along with him as he fell. They toppled to the bed, Doc’s arms circling Bdubs’ waist. He snorted, trying to wiggle away, but Doc’s hold stopped him and suddenly he was being flipped, back on the sheets and Doc crouched above him.

“Hello there,” Bdubs purred. 

He bit his lip as he wrapped his legs around Doc’s hips with a stifled moan, watching his eyes darken with lust. He stroked Doc’s cheek then gripped the back of his head, smashing their lips together. 

When they had kissed earlier it had been gentle - this was frantic, eager, _hungry_ , like they couldn’t get enough of each other. Each touch seared along Bdubs’ skin as he pulled himself closer and closer, until there was no space between them, attached down to the hips. He thrust desperately, gasping when his cock dragged along Doc’s stomach, the other’s erection twitching against his ass. 

Bdubs broke away to gasp for air, Doc’s mouth latching onto his neck and nipping at it.

“Nng - Doc,” his nails dug into that broad back as Doc tugged their hips impossibly closer, “I need you in me.”

Doc nodded against his throat, letting him back down to the bed before standing and digging through his pockets, coming back with a small bottle of lube. At Bdubs’ quirked eyebrow he ducked his head with a slight chuckle.

“Planning on getting lucky?” he asked.

“Well, I was hoping,” Doc admitted, “I _did_ come over here with a motive.”

Bdubs grinned, spreading his legs and palming his cock as Doc approached. He was sure that if Doc wasn’t already hard the image he was presenting would have him ready to go in no time. 

Doc popped the lid and poured lube into his organic hand, slicking his fingers and warming the liquid as quick as he could. He dropped to his knees, and before Bdubs could say anything, he was swallowing his cock in one swift movement. 

Bdubs nearly choked, the sudden assault of pleasure whiting out his brain for a moment as he struggled to catch up. Doc’s hot, wet tongue wriggled against him, distracting him as a slick finger pressed into his hole. 

“Fuck!” He shouted as his body easily accepted the digit. “Doc! Hn - ah!” 

A second finger entered him as Doc pulled off and pressed open-mouthed kisses along his shaft. He could now feel the stretch, the slight burn not bothering him, in fact he barely even felt it past the pleasure of Doc’s mouth. The head was sucked on, tongue flicking teasingly where Doc knew he liked it, cold metal fingers gently fondling his balls - the feeling startling but familiar and pleasant at the same time. 

Before he even realized, there were three fingers scissoring him open, soft moans of pleasure coming from his throat even as Doc seemed to carefully avoid his prostate. 

“I’m ready, come on,” Bdubs grunted as he grabbed for Doc, “I need you inside me - right now!”

Doc stilled and he looked down at him, watching as he pressed his forehead to Bdubs’ thigh with a shaky breath in like he was bracing himself. Thankfully, he didn’t do it for long, and then was looking up at Bdubs with a sultry wink and the slow withdrawal of his fingers. 

Bdubs scooted back up on the bed, making room, as Doc settled between his knees and slicked himself up. He grabbed Bdubs’ leg to adjust it as he lined up, eyes flicking up to meet his, Doc’s lips moving silently. 

_One last time_ , Bdubs’ mind translated, and a lump rose up and sat heavy in his throat.

Doc pressed in, the long, slow drag of his cock entering him sending shivers down his spine, but tears threatened to fall as the weight of what they were doing hit Bdubs. His hands rose and wrapped around Doc’s neck, dragging him down and holding him close, nose tucked against his neck. 

_One more time_ , Bdubs mouthed with a small nod, _I can do this_. He held Doc tightly.

The cock slid home, Bdubs clenching around it and enjoying Doc’s groan in his ear as he did. He hooked a foot around Doc and tilted his hips, allowing him to slide a little deeper. Bdubs wanted it - needed it - with a fervor he hadn’t realized. If this was truly their last hurrah, he had to make it a good one.

Doc’s breath tickled his neck as the other man began to thrust, slowly and carefully, but Bdubs wasn’t having that. He started to meet Doc’s thrusts, driving his hips down as he fucked in, panting as he did so. It wasn’t the perfect position - on his hands and knees would be better - but he was damned if he was going to let go of Doc now. 

Bdubs’ other leg came up, spreading his legs and driving down on Doc’s cock as much as he could. Doc swore softly, and he felt hands brace themselves on his sides as Doc began to move quicker.

“Bdubs,” Doc gasped, “ _Bdubs._ ”

“Doc! Doc, Doc, Doc!” He clung to him, voice catching in his throat as the angle changed enough to send shocks of pleasure through him.

He wished they could do this all night, in all sorts of positions - he wanted to burn the memory of Doc’s touch deep in his skin where it would never leave. But they only had a bed, some lube, and their divorce in the morning, so this would have to do. 

And strangely - it could be enough for him. Doc was familiar, his touch sure and safe, and the part of Bdubs’ heart where Doc had crawled in and made himself a home all those years ago sang with joy at each moment spent in the other’s embrace. 

Bdubs would never be a romantic though, so he just clutched Doc tighter and pretended the wetness gathering in the corner of his eyes was from pleasure, lifting his voice higher as he cried out.

“ _Doc_!”

Rough-skinned fingers wrapped around his cock and in a few strokes he was coming, suddenly and without warning, teeth sinking into the flesh before him as he did. Bdubs twitched as Doc rammed in and he felt himself be filled as the other came, having made it that their orgasm were close together. 

They stayed there for a minute, catching their breaths, as the heated air that had surrounded them cooled. Finally, Bdubs realized what, exactly, he was biting into and released his jaws.

“Sorry,” he murmured, rubbing over the indents he had left in the meat of Doc’s shoulder.

Doc just shrugged, helping to ease Bdubs’ legs down and sliding out slowly. Bdubs sighed quietly at the feeling of emptiness, but allowed Doc to pull out of his arms and stand, looking around for something to clean them off.

“Just use my shirt,” he said, “probably needed to be thrown out soon anyway.”

They were wiped off and the shirt tossed in the corner to be dealt with later, the covers tugged up to cover them both.

_Stay_ , Bdubs didn’t ask.

_Okay_ , Doc didn’t say.

Bdubs’ arm wrapped around Doc from behind and neither commented on the fact that Doc covered his hand with his. 

\- - -

Ren and Keralis met them at Xisuma’s base the next morning, the admin directing the others to a couple of chairs off to the side as he had Bdubs and Doc face each other. Bdubs found he couldn’t meet anyone’s gaze, eyes planted on the floor.

“This isn’t very complicated, now - just a few words from you two and confirmation from our witnesses over there, alright?” If Doc said something Bdubs wasn’t sure, his mind strangely blank. “Then it will be official and you can go your separate ways!”

A chill breeze blew through the jungle, making Bdubs shiver.

This was _necessary_ , they needed to do this. So why did he want to run? He knew they couldn’t keep on like this, but he - he -

_He didn’t want to be alone_.

“- Bdubs?” Doc’s voice startled him, looking up at him quickly. He gave a small smile, but it didn’t seem to make the expression on Doc’s face any better.

“Sorry - wasn’t listening. What was that?”

“Bdubs.” Doc reached for him.

“Wha -” Hands, one flesh, one metal, cupped his face.

“Bdubs, you’re _crying_.”

“No, I’m -” he rubbed at an eye, surprised to find it come away wet, “I’m fine! I just - I -” Ren and Keralis had stood, and he could see their faces fill with concern. “I. I’m.” What? His voice wavered.

Doc looked to Xisuma. “Give us a minute alone.” The others cleared out quickly, leaving them standing there, Bdubs wiping his eyes around Doc’s hands. The tears didn’t want to stop.

“I-I’m okay,” he stuttered, trying to pull away. Doc’s hold was firm, not letting him run away.

“Bdubs. What’s wrong? _Honey_ , what’s wrong?”

A sob forced its way out of Bdubs’ throat at that word, the tenderness on Doc’s face as he said it.

“ _I’m sorry_.” He choked out, trying to cover his face. “I can’t - I don’t want to be alone!”

He was suddenly pressed against Doc’s chest, the larger man wrapping an arm around his back and holding him there, shushing him. 

“It’s okay, it’s okay,” Doc murmured, letting Bdubs hide his face against his chest, “you won’t be alone. Listen, you have Keralis, and other friends that want to see you. You’re going to be okay. We won’t be together, but maybe we could get some coffee together sometime in the future? It might take a while but we don’t have to _not_ see each other, okay?”

Bdubs sucked in a shuddering breath, nodding. The tears were slowing, Doc’s soothing words washing over him. 

“Maybe we can be friends again?” he asked softly. He felt Doc sigh heavily, and for a moment he was afraid of his answer.

“We will try. I swear.”

They took a few more minutes to collect themselves, Bdubs drying his face and not looking at Doc. He could do this, he could.

When the others came back, he tuned out most of what was said. He said the words he was supposed to and watched as Xisuma made a few symbols in the air, Keralis and Ren confirming they had witnessed the event, and then it was done. No big fanfare or sparks, just a deep breath and a false sense of calm Bdubs forced himself to feel.

“There we go, boys. Done and done.”

He felt Keralis take his hand, leading him away from the others. Bdubs gave him a reassuring smile and thanked him, gripping his hand tightly. He tried not to, but he shot a look over his shoulder to watch Doc and Ren leave through the portal.

Doc met his eyes as the purple magic enveloped him and he inclined his head - a good bye.

Bdubs took another breath, and another, putting one foot in front of the other as Keralis helped him walk away from what had been a big part of his life.

It was done. They were divorced.

And he could do this.


End file.
